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Open Poetry #35
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Professor Gloom
Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082
of Depression

0 posted 2005-03-30 08:48 PM


The knight on white all of seventeen full hands
Did ride with pride throughout the hinterlands,
His sword was swore to protection of all.
Ride fine knight, guardian of the right,
Cheer his sight in purity of white
Evils ills will retreat when he is given the call;
Come brave knight enter the fight
Till morn’s light shows all is again right.

For many years
He fought back others fears,
Having naught but gear and horse
He rode the righteous course
Till one early spring day
He didn’t return this way
Days and weeks passed by
And none knew where or why.

It was spring late
When at the castle gate
His white horse sauntered
And reluctantly entered
Carrying saddle and shield
Muddied by the field
And a blue scarf tied
Where once the knight did ride.

The high horse went to pasture
The knight never came after
And the people were left to wonder.

Gloom


© Copyright 2005 Aszard Drazlom - All Rights Reserved
Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
1 posted 2005-03-30 10:11 PM


There is more to this write than meets the eye first time round. Excellent Prof.
hugs, Chris

"The soul that can speak through the eyes can also kiss with a gaze."
Gustavo Adolfo Becquer

miscellanea
Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060
OH
2 posted 2005-03-31 01:30 PM


  The high horse went to pasture--a nice place to be in Spring...  The meadows become more verdant as I write.  And what became of the knight?  One can only guess. I like how you leave the reader hanging. Also, liked the word play...

                ~miscellanea

    

  

[This message has been edited by miscellanea (03-31-2005 07:02 PM).]

majnu
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088
SF Bay Area
3 posted 2005-03-31 05:16 PM


nice, depressing, but nice

-majnu
--------------------------------------
Timid thoughts be not afraid. I am a Poet.

Jessie Carstein
Junior Member
since 2004-01-08
Posts 41

4 posted 2005-04-01 05:53 AM


This would have been great, had your rhyme scheme been completely fluid like the later stanza, early on it is just too messy I'm afraid, good style though and very interesting.
LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

5 posted 2005-04-01 07:28 AM


reminding me of a spiritual King Arthur of sorts, like the scent of a round table of honor...filling up ones soul

Good Good morning sir, missed sorely your writings...good to have you back....

Happy Friday

Sadelite
Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519

6 posted 2005-04-04 08:43 PM


Professor,

   Really liked this and am sending it to the top.  Might you consider a few sequels?

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