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Open Poetry #34
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Laurel
| Open Poetry #34 |
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Laurel |
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Huan Yi Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688Waukegan 
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I suspect, if I died first,... you'd buy the plot next to me in the ground. And then, enclosed, reveal to all your secret held so long. There, beside, to bare of seed a shrine whose slender limbs with leaves would shade our common bed; women... are very strange. |
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| © Copyright 2005 John Pawlik - All Rights Reserved | |||
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DavePage Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917 |
I dont think this comes across as you intended but I dont think that "as I understand it" knowledge of Asian life is a matter day course of life, is what also doesn't come across. Dave |
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Juju Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429In your dreams |
Yes we are strange. I spaz out and I am never able to say how I feal until its too late. Its a stage..... I hope. Juju |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
cool write! |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
"And then, enclosed, reveal to all your secret held so long" nah...I am just waiting for some of the main characters to die, then I will tell my secrets... Well done John! "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
You layered these laurels well, John... |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
fine write john susan? you slay me..smooch |
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
"women... are very strange." You are very brave my friend, and yet, I do agree... . JL |
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*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
I like this...very mysterious in a way.  ~Alli~ Happy 2005! |
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