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Open Poetry #34
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Oceanus
| Open Poetry #34 |
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Oceanus |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
So you played among the stones And found the green shadows grey at last In the tumbled landscape so sown with path That grew or failed yet led to everywhere As I sighed your name on amber winds Hoping the scent of Pinion would bury itself Against your skin And find you not just an end of tailored words Sewing small stitches of time into some brocade to wear When you felt the urge to feel wind on cheek Or something to thrill Or maybe you will know Such stones as these are small And that While you stared I hummed low tunes To shake the marrow of bones and crumble flesh Into dusty shards, then tossed aside as if free Of notes or harmony distilled if it was Of heartbeats and ache… How much I ask then can you take? Enough? Or more than you can bear? Tell me river songs little one While I braid your hair |
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| © Copyright 2004 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
This is a fine fine weaving of a thing. Hope all is well with you. Corinne |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
thank you ma'am... kinder words than I deserve... but greatly appreciated... with me.. things are.. and with you? |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Tell me wind songs little one While I braid your hair ~*~ Always the promise of touch and story. |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
song blowing in the wind while you braided my wet hair, somebody told me they loved me today |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Sunshine... thanks for the eys..and the kind words.. Inked... :: smiling:: to be told that you are loved is something rare... thank you for the words.. the eyes.. and the share... |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Cpat An intricate cut of symbols but it ended well. Enjoyed |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Can it really be that simple? sighing here |
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soul drifter Senior Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 711Colorado |
Wow, that's...wow. Wonderful poem. "Poets are all who love, who feel great truths, and tell them; and the truth of truths is love." --Philip James Bailey |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Karen? yes Ron? this is just . . . beauty. |
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babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City |
Tell me river songs little one While I braid your hair *********************************** ::touching...truly::: so much love, chief... **babygirL** **Intoxicant to the SouL** |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Ron "How much I ask then can you take? Enough? Or more than you can bear? Tell me river songs little one While I braid your hair" These last lines are so poignant that they brought tears.  |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
When I read you, I know that I will read "real." Yes, it can be that simple can't it? Do you realize that Oceanus is my favorite scent - no? Well it is - sold at The Body Shop. Just a thought but nice thing to buy that special one you touch with feathered whispers Captain!  Oh you are sure getting like an aged bottle of wine lately you know that? Example is not the main thing in influencing others, it is the only thing. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Tell me river songs little one While I braid your hair braid my hair... and I'll sing  Mxx into this night i wonder, it's morning that i dread, another day of knowing of, the path i fear to tread. |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
When reading you, I not only get a treat of smooth as silk reading, but I come away feeling as if I have been enlightened a bit and given a lesson on the soft edge. Excellent or superb ... your choice or both as this one rates it. |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
when I find the words I will be back...sigh......... damn.... The greatest beauty on earth, is |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
"While you stared I hummed low tunes To shake the marrow of bones and crumble flesh Into dusty shards, then tossed aside as if free Of notes or harmony distilled if it was Of heartbeats and ache… How much I ask then can you take? Enough? Or more than you can bear? Tell me river songs little one While I braid your hair" I thought I signed this Captain, as I remember reading it yesterday... I wanted you to know I was here, read, and so very much enjoyed this piece. Now while the leaves still dance on the wind |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
you can braid? I have never known a man that could braid. You have many hidden talents.  "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Dautz Write Member
since 2004-11-16
Posts 96 |
Your poem made me think of the growing babe, Oceanus, and the hardships the Pilgrims faced during and after they crossed the Atlantic. Yet, times of warmth were found for simple things like the braiding of a child's hair. A pleasure to read dautz... |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Tonight I took time to read the comments... I keep going back to what I always say... and I won't repeat it here. By now, I trust you realize.... yes. Do it. |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
you without a doubt are one of the best writers i have ever read |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
perhaps my favorite from all your fine pennings holding me gently, by the braids *saving this one* |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
 made me sigh.......beautyful pennedCharisma |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Ron, you rock...  and your words sweet man, are always so touching |
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Hockeychick19 Member
since 2002-10-29
Posts 430Massachusetts, USA |
Ron, Great write! Enjoyed it very much You paint a lovely picture with your words.~Kelly~ Life is a gift so live it to the fullest! |
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