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Open Poetry #34
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James_A_Fraser
Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972
Out Making Anticlines

0 posted 2004-11-08 03:54 PM



Keyless

press once
and the door
locks

twice and
the horn pips
for me

sometimes
I do it to hear
the sound

machine or not
at least it’s
a reaction

and I need that

I don’t care
that I’m locking
locked doors







[This message has been edited by James_A_Fraser (11-09-2004 07:53 PM).]

© Copyright 2004 James A. Fraser - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2004-11-08 03:57 PM



DANG man...
this one hurts!

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2004-11-08 04:05 PM


WOW!!!  Fantastic write!!
Hugs~Nancy

Now while the leaves still dance on the wind
While the moon and the clouds come spinning
Will you whisper my name again?
Again..and again.

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
3 posted 2004-11-08 04:23 PM


I agree with Sunshine... this one hurts!!! And not at all what you should know, my friend... however well you write the ache of forlorn, the pain of not feeling you matter, I wish/hope it's imagination!!

And if it's not... let me at 'em... a little suthern hellraising should wake 'em up to appreciating you! *G*

myheart
Member
since 2004-11-05
Posts 160
lost in your eyes
4 posted 2004-11-08 05:03 PM


Awesome! Just awesome!!
~myheart~

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
5 posted 2004-11-08 05:21 PM


Jamie....snif


miscellanea
Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060
OH
6 posted 2005-02-04 12:17 PM


Glad I found this!  It's the type of poem that will keypt turning over and over in my cranial engine!  

I admire how you take a simple concept and scope it from different angles.  You're a master at this...

        misc'e

                        

miscellanea
Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060
OH
7 posted 2005-02-04 02:32 PM


(Had to come back and put this in my library)
James_A_Fraser
Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972
Out Making Anticlines
8 posted 2005-02-05 09:42 AM


I wrote this one with PIP in mind, actually -- to capture the feeling that I'd had (and keep having, alas) when I wrote my soul into a poem and almost nobody replied.....at that point I was questioning why I bother to post....still do, sometimes.

AND -- Nobody read it~!



~~J

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
9 posted 2005-02-05 05:25 PM


Jamie: I think that is the unfortunate fate of some of the best poetry given to us on these blue pages... I just hope those with few reads never give up... for popularity and excellence are not always the same things. *S*

As for this poem... it made such an impact that I thought about it all the time I was on vacation with my sister in a rental car with a remote lock. *S*

That isn't an effect you see here... but it is the measure of good poetry... that it's remembered long after the computer is turned off and the reader turns to the non-poetic world.

the_loner_23
Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA
10 posted 2005-02-05 06:11 PM


I felt the pain in this one. Awesome write.

Cold hands means a warm heart

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