Open Poetry #34 |
re-genesis |
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
darkness - darkness I am Nod weave aware the lines of her I broke the brittle charcoal stick making dots her eyes are this as the whites are tasty eggs teasing at my tongue. I dream smooth a sideways circumstance drifting with the calm of this my wrist is stroking where I want lips a pout and dreams of it like the serpent beckoning Eve to take the taste a kiss slithering the fork I miss the anguish of the choice... |
||
© Copyright 2004 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City |
omg... I was so drawn into this, Serenity....excellent poem! **babygirL** **Intoxicant to the SouL** |
||
Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
*nod* agony of choice. Well done Karen. "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
You never fail with your words, or where you want to take us. |
||
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
serenity, Involved enough to make me LOL Your beautiful. |
||
Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
WHAO! you collapse me m'lady. and I am haunted |
||
aujussy wolf
since 2003-08-09
Posts 1215Michigan |
so cool and crisp , i like the sharpness in this poem ~w |
||
Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
good grief! This just drew me in and kept me in pause mode until the ending then bam.... your so damn good at this! |
||
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Me loves when you are candle dancing me lovely Sen. Ink runs from the corners of my mouth. |
||
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
thank you |
||
Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Umm and I am haunted |
||
Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
.....Damn!! Fantastic write lady~ ~Autumn..the year's last, loveliest smile.~ |
||
Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
Wow! Absoloutely, amazingly, wonderfully, incredibly... there i've exhausted my vocabulary. Great writing and muchly enjoyed. Andrew |
||
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
ah yes... it always does something to me to read you... Well done Lady 'Awlens... |
||
vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
"lips a pout and dreams of it like the serpent beckoning Eve to take the taste a kiss slithering the fork I miss the anguish of the choice..." No one says it like you, K... and this?... needs to go back to the top... smile love you, lady... "When the power of love overcomes the love |
||
*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
Amazing write! ~Alli~ Happy 2005! |
||
Juju Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429In your dreams |
I like How you use words Juju Juju - 1.) a magic charm or fetish 2.)Magic 3.)A taboo connected woth the use of magic |
||
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
i like the concept... nod ( ) suggestion - don't be afraid to make the lines longer... this felt disjointed - like a long sigh broken into a few terse exhalations. |
||
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
and miss vicky's been busy... thanks all for reading, and nods to C--I think that's something I started doing to try to control how ya'll read it. I have issues yanno. Thanks again you guys, ya'll are great. |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |