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Open Poetry #34
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Utterance of a Single Tear (lament with Dark Angel)
| Open Poetry #34 |
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Utterance of a Single Tear (lament with Dark Angel) |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving 
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Left to grasping the moment like a broken language the pieces escaping in exhale of breath between silent pauses that could not encompass the traces of truth left hammered without love without motions of sound, the vibration of valleys and the shudder of glass from the beating of imagined wings of muted angels tarred by night. suffocating on feathered intentions that softly creep onto tongue; choking out the sound for reprieve just for the utterance of a single tear I exist as nothing within my words a myth forged, shaped into hard steps steep and mangled like winter; the sleeping smell of flesh the old stink of perversion too putrid to spit out... too unforgivable to swallow. ` ` ` ` (an entwined lament between muted and Dark Angel) |
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| © Copyright 2004 Dawn van Krieken-Smith - All Rights Reserved | |||
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Good God, this IS BEAUTY: from the beating of imagined wings of muted angels tarred by night. suffocating on feathered intentions that softly creep onto tongue; choking out the sound for reprieve just for the utterance of a single tear sounds like the both of you . . . this is amazing, it IS truly the both of you entwined. How genius! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
"I exist as nothing within my words" nodding That is why I write... |
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babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City |
"and the shudder of glass from the beating of imagined wings of muted angels tarred by night. suffocating on feathered intentions " simply o u t s t a n d i n g... **babygirL** **Intoxicant to the SouL** |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Wonderful harmony, really Such a firm voice from something as small as a tear |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
two of my favorites... and in blend they are rich in metaphor, and imagery, and in heart.. bravo.... bravo |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
this is passion the blend of edges ladys weaving minds with heart spin enjoyed it |
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Greeneyes 
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
WOW such an amazing gift you both bring.....true poets...  ~~*~~ |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
thanks all of you for those fantastic replies... and thank you Maria, for your depth and unique imagery.... you are a pleasure  |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
suffocating on feathered intentions that softly creep onto tongue; choking out the sound for reprieve just for the utterance of a single tear I exist as nothing within my words damn ladies......I believe this is the best duet I have ever seen grace these pages of blue... BRAVA! The greatest beauty on earth, is |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
oh Donna, you just blew me away with that reply... thank you soooo much |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Ok, so duet again...and again, and again...  |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
This combined effort flows so powerfully down the page that it doesn't appear as an effort at all, but as a power of nature, where thoughts meet and are transformed into words reflecting just one single intent. Amazing write. Love, Margherita |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
I'll come back to this, right now i'm in shock that i wasn't told of this, heads will roll |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
HEY! Thank you all so very much for your wonderful wonderful replies.  Dawn? thanks m'dear for well even wanting to du-et with me heh. It was all my pleasure. You're amazing.  Bello? we didn't plan it, well we kinda did, but that was like months ago and then well from one moment to the next, it just happened lol. (Could you make sure my head rolls onto a silver platter pleeeaase)  Mxx and I am haunted by my illicit exquisite dream but I can't really wake up so I just drift in between ~ani difranco~ |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
... This is outstanding!!! Hugging you both so tight. ~Autumn..the year's last, loveliest smile.~ |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
Silver platter? I'll give you a wooden spoon ting ting..ahem. Well despite being kept out of the loop, dramatic sigh.. I enjoyed the surprise and of course you two already know my thoughts on the two of you together..Not THOSE ones i meant writing, writing. |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Well done you two! Very well done. "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
I exist as nothing within my words a myth forged, shaped into hard steps steep and mangled like winter; the sleeping smell of flesh the old stink of perversion too putrid to spit out... too unforgivable to swallow. my my my... I relte to this whole thing all to well I fear.. you've both managed to touch something in me with this... thank you |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
Too many great lines to pull a favorite out. You two capture so much with this write. And you defintely meld well, 'cause this is beautiful poetry. Always, Alyssa He was a man of sorrows |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
had to come back... and let you both know I had been here..lol.. this is truly a very wonderful write... and you both touch something in me here..so thank you |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
superb! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Left to grasping the moment like a broken language the pieces escaping in exhale of breath between silent pauses that could not encompass the traces of truth left hammered without love without motions of sound, the vibration of valleys and the shudder of glass from the beating of imagined wings of muted angels tarred by night. suffocating on feathered intentions that softly creep onto tongue; choking out the sound for reprieve just for the utterance of a single tear I exist as nothing within my words ======================================== I could have sworn I replied to this... but ever the tardy moth...let me now say, outstanding blending of expressions. excellent writing girlies!! Poetry is emotion put into measure. |
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choshi Senior Member
since 2004-01-01
Posts 1184New York |
Such a union of words, images and spirit intertwined as one.....Beautiful! Bravo.....to you both ~P |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
There have been so many fantastic duets on the boards lately and this... is definately one of my favorites... just wanted to breath it in again ladies... it is superior! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
I thought I'd replied to this also. It's fabulous writing that blended like a smoothy. to both of you. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Thanks everyone, your replies and comments have been absolutely wonderful, I thank you. and Dawn Darling? I miss you!  Mxx into this night i wonder, it's morning that i dread, another day of knowing of, the path i fear to tread. |
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Kevo Member
since 2004-06-02
Posts 466Navarro County, Texas, USA |
Muted & Maree, No wonder why there were so many posts! I can't believe I walked away for a bit and missed this slice of Heaven. This piece of writing really takes the cake. It is incredibly visual which was incredible based on the content. It was thoroughly thought provoking and all-enveloping. It grabbed me by the eyeballs at line 1 and held me there to the last. Maree, I have been a huge fan of your gifted words for a while. Muted, I am now a fan of yours. Your writing is simply superb. Your talent rivals some of the best I've read. Both write with such cinematic scope, intellect, and gifted talent that this place would be at a loss without your inspiring presence. Thanks for posting a piece worthy of gold-lined pages for us all to absorb freely. It's writing like this that inspires me most and reminds me how lucky I am to among such gifted poets in the confines of these blue pages. I am completely awe-struck! Your humble fellow poet, Kevin |
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