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Open Poetry #33
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babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City

0 posted 2004-10-19 06:58 AM


Dying is a holiday,
aged along the soul's
longest days, to weigh
the intolerable epiphany
of easy virtue in vowels
and erosion, the ambrosia
of poems torn by the tongs
of flesh, a tune imagines
my slow reckoning of hairs
pulled out of the comb
of lost teeth, of scars
and the brevity of hours
devoured by leopards of jade,
so fades the laden mirror
filled with the diminutions
that echo on the page,
to bury themselves
under the ashes of passion,
light recedes from wounds
in the unreasonable solace
of tears, as they reiterate
mirror images
of dreams,
of dreams,
that leave me
unhealed, the night
now becomes a habit
of flesh, slashed by scimitars,
interminably trapped in syllables,
mirrors without end, end
in eternity as it bends
the entrails of steel, to the feel
of the delicate, clairvoyant body,
and blood becomes a burden
beyond the unendurable,
as light explodes
between each veterbra,
a torment of red chemo treatments
o p e n  the body
to the low breathing
of liquid holidays that fade
with the brevity
of these aged hours,
devoured by the pages
of my burning.

2004 copyright BbaygirLPress
:::I realize this is heavy...bear with me:::



  Poetic Constellations

© Copyright 2004 babygirLPress - All Rights Reserved
LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

1 posted 2004-10-19 07:12 AM


bearing with you and standing there beside you, extending a quiet heart, shoulder and arms...

this was an extremely powerful write....
my thoughts are there with this extremely powerful and well versed poetess...


babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
2 posted 2004-10-19 07:23 AM


Thank you Lee J....your warmth is deeply felt...

this one was difficult to compose in that the energy and spirit with which it is written is still raw...even more difficult to return to and read (for me)...but no less of a healing...

thanks again for the encouragement..

**babygirL**

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
3 posted 2004-10-19 07:26 AM


We like heavy around here

and you are fast becoming the queen.

"cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind"
~Sarah McLachlan~

babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
4 posted 2004-10-19 07:52 AM


Susan~

thank you for the kind reply...

**babygirL**

Mysteria
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
5 posted 2004-10-19 01:34 PM


You know I could have commented on about every single thought written here, but won't.  Instead I will thank you for giving death a face.  Death has caused me to lose part of my soul, and I don't believe that anyone could do it justice as you have here.  Heavy?  Yes, and a heaviness that will surely weigh on your heart forever, if you let it.

"Dying is a holiday,
aged along the soul's
longest days,"

It was a holiday I prayed someone I loved to love go on every day, for longer than I will ever be able forget.

Heavy you say?  It had to be no other way.

[This message has been edited by Mysteria (10-19-2004 02:37 PM).]

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

6 posted 2004-10-19 01:49 PM


yes ma'am... for one so young you write with an age..and an understanding that speaks to your depths...

bravo... with a touch


babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
7 posted 2004-10-19 03:03 PM


Mysteria

::tears:: I know you feel me...thank you...

**babygirL**

babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
8 posted 2004-10-19 03:05 PM


Cpat~

w e l l....I ain't that young...lol..I have been gifted with a long line of youthful genes...and the pic you see is about 4 years old...little more quicksilver in the hair these days...lol

Thanks for stopping to see...inside...
**babygirL**

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

9 posted 2004-10-19 03:10 PM


(chuckling).. inside is where best to see... and yes ma'am.. you are that young... quicksilver or not..


I'll stand on my premise the depths belie the years..and as some would say and old soul resides within.

babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
10 posted 2004-10-19 03:15 PM


lol...ok Cpat...I'll concede you the thought...and thank you (deeply)...but as they say:

it takes one, to know one...

P E A C E and O N E
**babygirL**

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
11 posted 2004-10-19 03:20 PM


BG...get with it...everyone concedes, once or twice in their lifetime, to Cpat...

As for your poem, I felt this rawness, and admire your ability to glide through a poem with few commas or periods [and certainly no ellipses - my downfall].

You have an inner energy much to be admired.  And your old soul is showing...

[see?  those danged ellipses...]

babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
12 posted 2004-10-19 03:25 PM


lol...thank you, Sunshine!

**babygirL**

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
13 posted 2004-10-22 12:19 PM


Dead


I was the moon.

A shadow hid me
and I knew what it meant
not to be at all.

The moon in eclipse is sad
and sinless.
There is no passion in her plight.

Cold, unlighted,
moving in trance,
she comes to her station
or passes again to her place;

uncovers her loneliness:
eyeless behind no eyelids
has neither sleeping nor waking,
no body, parts, nor passions,
no loving, perceiving,
having, nor being;

moves only in a wayless night;

and drifting, as a ship without direction,
sinks into a forgotten depth,

among weeds,
among stones.


Rhoda Coghill


babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
14 posted 2004-10-22 06:38 AM


huan yi...

thank you for your reply...

love&light,
**babygirL**

**Intoxicant to the SouL**

TexUS
Member
since 2003-03-20
Posts 228

15 posted 2004-11-14 11:02 PM


This one leaves me speechless, though, I just couldn't go away without acknowledging what an amazing poet you are.
babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
16 posted 2004-11-15 01:25 PM


thank you, TexUS...

love&light,
**babygirL**

**Intoxicant to the SouL**

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

17 posted 2004-11-18 08:38 AM


light recedes from wounds
in the unreasonable solace
of tears, as they reiterate
mirror images
of dreams,
of dreams,
that leave me
unhealed, the night
now becomes a habit
  damn...

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
18 posted 2004-11-18 10:40 AM


love the "torn by the tongs of flesh"... so lyrical and catchy (next season's new jingle!) seriously though, while i can see the weight in this, it doesn't (to me) feel so heavy, more... openly reminiscent.

i like it, sits well as an after-breakfast snack.

babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
19 posted 2004-11-22 08:50 AM


thanks for checking this out, christopher...

**babygirL**

**Intoxicant to the SouL**

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