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Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

0 posted 2004-10-18 07:17 PM

you were dove on sky
with quiet voice
you made shadows there
on the mountain of me

I touched your feather place
with my eye hands
you shivered in the mornings
and searched for trees

where you could groom
and realign the proper
but you said it felt better
messed up and fixing

then it did before
when you were just pretty
and didn't know the arrow
or falling slow to love

into a shadow's hands
______________
Dark

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

1 posted 2004-10-18 07:22 PM

you were dove on sky
with quiet voice
=======================

youre just sooooo good at this.
beautiful opening line groovy guy.
You'll have all the moths sighing right from the start.

babygirlwlove
Senior Member

since 2004-10-10

Posts 1180
New York City

2 posted 2004-10-18 07:23 PM

"and didn't know the arrow
or falling slow to love"

these visions painted tender...

niiiice, Darkie...
**babygirL**

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

3 posted 2004-10-18 08:04 PM

DS

"falling slow to love" How good that feeling is...and gentle like a dove.

Greeneyes

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-09-09

Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

4 posted 2004-10-18 09:11 PM

such a gentle side, what a true feeling of love....hugsss you

~~*~~
Read between the lines
look deep into each word
and you will understand the
depth of my soul (GE)
~~**~~

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant

since 2004-10-12

Posts 6688
Waukegan

5 posted 2004-10-18 09:38 PM

"then it did before"

or

"than it did before"

?

This is good

John

Susan
Member Ascendant

since 2004-03-27

Posts 5104
walking the surreal

6 posted 2004-10-18 10:02 PM

D-

this is sigh worthy - lovely in its loving - very nice -

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

7 posted 2004-10-18 11:19 PM

There is more to this...
there is a death,
and rebirth...

there is quiet light lingering...

there is also...

wonderful.

Seems to me, Sir...
you are very good to a poet's origin
of understanding.

Kahlil
Senior Member

since 2003-04-12

Posts 1881

8 posted 2004-10-19 12:07 PM

this is falling slow to love lovely...

K

Larry C

Member Patricius

since 2001-09-10

Posts 10286
United States

9 posted 2004-10-19 01:25 AM

DS,
You are indeed a talented tender hearted man. Much to be learned at your feet...

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

10 posted 2004-10-19 05:35 AM

hmmm....love this

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

11 posted 2004-10-19 07:06 AM

spiritual knowing without touching...but the sense of something great and powerful
realizing the vulnurability of mankind....the assurance of all things

Your a real hipster when it comes to awareness my friend...

Hiya and Good morning
wishing you a great day

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

12 posted 2004-10-19 07:35 AM

"you made shadows there
on the mountain of me"

very nice.

morning. (and pass the coffee)

"cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind"
~Sarah McLachlan~

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

13 posted 2004-10-19 06:31 PM

"wow"

I almost saw her.

gentle and mesmerizing

this one left me with my head slightly tilted, lost in the thoughts that remained...

miscellanea
Member Elite

since 2004-06-24

Posts 4060
OH

14 posted 2004-10-19 07:50 PM

Dark Stranger,
   It seems as if my muse hid in your words tonight.  I hope you don't mind a poetic accompaniment and echo from a stranger.  I enjoyed this very much.     ~miscellanea

you were dove on sky                             you, in subconscious loving
with quiet voice                                       frightened  my tiny voice
you made shadows there                         My shadows were doubling
on the mountain of me                             Weighing the valley to me

I touched your feather place                      Now you touch my feather sways
with my eye hands                                  dusting with time morphed sands;
you shivered in the mornings                    I quiver in the fordings
and searched for trees                             searching for nest of trees to land

where you could groom                             I found no groom
and realign the proper                              would realign the proper;
but you said it felt better                           it felt no better
messed up and fixing                               messed up and mixing

then it did before                                     Then it did before
when you were just pretty                         when I was just a pretty dove
and didn't know the arrow                         and didn’t know the arrow
or falling slow to love                                or the falling slow of love

into a shadow's hands                             left in shadow’s hands

[This message has been edited by miscellanea (10-19-2004 10:08 PM).]

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