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Open Poetry #33
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Down By Two
| Open Poetry #33 |
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Down By Two |
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babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City 
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Down by two the bruised-blue flesh of the bronze butterfly's escape through sacrifice, flays the emotions, unwholesome the silence that goes before her, a sound like the heart bound to beat like butterfly wings, gently her absence quick upon me, inhales the night and swiftly, the dark sees only ease to relinquish her candles sheathed in glass epitaphs that collapse like veins to fill the fluent air with the spare embrace of the blue elements, down by two in the bottom of the ninth, two out, two on, two strikes, the soul's too tragic abhorrence of details fails to deliver the impossible syntax of apocalypse, on the lips of a courteous Christ, crucified by light, the night fades far into the furthest exile, under cancer, her unobscured brilliance pierces the vault of heaven's vast gathering of angels, in their illegible scripture, shatter the soul in one primal instant grand slam dream, quicksilver through her midnight moment's landscape, every cherished feature in flight, the light of the bronze butterfly's escape through sacrifice to the silver flame of moonlight's crucial adieu. 2004 copyright babygirLPress **dedicated to my Mom, and anyone whose life has been changed by the effects of breast cancer** |
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| © Copyright 2004 babygirLPress - All Rights Reserved | |||
Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
My dear girl, if in fact our departed loved ones know what we do, then your Mother must be bursting with pride, and telling all her new friends about you this fine day. What a fabulous poem, and I sure hope you submit it to somewhere to be published. Your poetry was sheer delight and the use of baseball and butterflies as metaphors was magic! I am so sorry for your loss, and know the feel of it myself. Write it out, it helps trust me, and helps others to get to their locked up feelings too. Lucky you! Autumn in New York! I shall re-post a poem just for you this was done about a friend of mine who died a few years ago that lived out at the lake in New Rochelle! I miss her presence but she is always right here if I feel her. Here is the link for you to read and see the pictures from New York. I do feel your pain. /pip/Forum90/HTML/003450.html |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
a sound like the heart bound to beat like butterfly wings, gently her absence quick upon me, inhales the night and swiftly, the dark sees only ease to relinquish her candles sheathed in glass Fantastic writing, so full of poignancy and beauty. Very well done.  The greatest beauty on earth, is |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
I ditto the above comment, adding if a family member was inflicted with disease you would, let me refrase that, I would do anything possible to keep them here, for as long as possible...there are two sides of the coin which phrase...in the name of science...it's the name of life...and to hold onto it, for as long as humanly possible... God bless you...and yours...and us for this encouraging poem...light...hope! |
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babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City |
Mysteria.... thank you for the heartfelt reply and again for sharing your poetry with me...it is deeply felt in this old eastcoast soul... **babygirL** |
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babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City |
Gentlespirit & Lee J... thank you so much for stopping in on this...I so look forward to reading more of you as well... **babygirL** |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
I haven't welcomed you yet...so welcome!! (I have been slacking) I have been reading you...and look forward to reading more... Susan "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Welcome to PIP....(I'm the quiet guy around here...just mostly envy the others..)..fine write |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
This is such fresh writing, My God it flows right down the page It is breast cancer awareness month (waves at Sharon up there) check this out: http://www.thebreastcancersite.com/cgi-bin/WebObjects/CTDSites Welcome to PIP you are one amazing soul. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
A Fabulous write! Enjoyed. Not sure if I've welcomed you, but if I havent... Welcome to Passions!  cuz fate is not just whose cooking smells good |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
I know the feeling.... I too lost my mother to breast cancer. ~Heart Hugs~ ~Autumn..the year's last, loveliest smile.~ |
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babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City |
thank you all for the warm welcome...and well wishes... I look forward to getting to know each of you through your work...this seems like a fantastic board....great to be a part of it... **babygirL** |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Welcome to Passions! I like your style very much. A very moving introduction to you. I look forward to reading more. |
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babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City |
Serenityblaze... thank you kindly...I likewise look forward to reading you... **babygirL** |
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aujussy wolf
since 2003-08-09
Posts 1215Michigan |
an Awesome place this poem holds liked this lots babyg latta ~w |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
a sound like the heart bound to beat like butterfly wings, gently her absence quick upon me, inhales the night and swiftly, the dark sees only ease to relinquish her candles sheathed in glass epitaphs that collapse like veins to fill the fluent air with the spare embrace of the blue elements, ~*~ Young lady... you've done your mother proud. Again, Welcome to Passions! |
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babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City |
Wolfie~thank you... and Sunshine...you have welcomed me so kindly into your home~thank you... **babygirL** |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Superb writing... Welcome to Passions! *S* |
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