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Open Poetry #33
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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2004-09-28 04:25 AM


God:

"We've been reduced to games."

The Goddess nodded hurricanes

as she whipped her hair to hide

the tears that streamed the goddess eyes

marking rivers mapped anew.

God: "My Goddess, I love you..."

whisper heavy sighs of tide

and with a finger's circumstance

God created winds that dance
from the sea of salt of tears
that the Goddess wept

"goodbye"

"Let me kiss you once again..."

"God..." she laughed, "you're full of you!"

pulling Goddess panties on...

"but then," she smiled, "you're God, aren't you?"

Smiling as she shut the door, as God lit his cigarette.

[This message has been edited by serenity blaze (09-28-2004 05:22 AM).]

© Copyright 2004 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

1 posted 2004-09-28 06:23 AM


WOW, just WOW!

greatbigsigh

I have no words, I do, I mean...they just won't come out right.

I love it when YOU come out to play

to my library

Mxx


Well I see you doing, What I try to do for me, With the words from a poet, And a voice from a choir, And a melody, nothing else matters. ~Stevie Nicks

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2004-09-28 06:35 AM



Now...THAT's personifying a storm...

Very well done, serenity.  This one,
as Maree sort of said,
is a

Karilea - if I whisper, will you listen?  Keeping in mind, I must stand close...

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
3 posted 2004-09-28 09:00 AM


Amazing...simply amazing!!
Love ya lady~
Into my library this goes!

~Autumn..the year's last, loveliest smile.~

kayjay
Member Elite
since 2002-06-24
Posts 2015
Oregon
4 posted 2004-09-28 09:05 AM


What a creative way to visualize recent events.  Well done!  Ken

Through rubble and trouble and dark of night
The yawn of a dawn will hasten the light

Skyfire
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
5 posted 2004-09-28 12:09 PM


I love it ^_^

and then He created the horse...

Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
6 posted 2004-09-28 01:17 PM


Considering I am still smiling, you can bet I absolutely loved this - loved it!
miscellanea
Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060
OH
7 posted 2004-09-28 03:18 PM


Wow.  Three simple letters that fall in place when I can't describe the intensity of the poem! Your creative thinking and writing is amazing to me!  Shall I bow down to you?  Just kidding.  Simply amazing.  Keeper is written all over this!
                    miscellanea

Midnitesun
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Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
8 posted 2004-09-28 03:47 PM


LOL, talk about smokin....
You always paint the scene with a new hue.
a great spin, Karen

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
9 posted 2004-09-29 12:45 PM


agreeing with Kacy here, only you could write this . . .

It reminded me of The Prophet,
his sketches:

http://www.kahlil.org/artwork009.html

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
10 posted 2004-09-29 01:18 PM


Yep! there she is.

Love this, m'witch!

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

11 posted 2004-09-29 07:11 PM


Thanks you guys...I'm glad this wasn't taken offensively, as the personification was based on my own belief system(s) (not to mention experience--laughing) and not intended as a slight to anyone else's religion/spiritual beliefs--nor was intended to make light of anyone's hardships either.

My prayers are with those who have felt (and continue to) feel the brunt of what is hopefully, this PAST hurricane season.


thank you to those who understood and replied



(stay dry, yeti...wet fur is only good in small doses-- )

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