navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #33 » Woman
Open Poetry #33
Post A Reply Post New Topic Woman Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York

0 posted 2004-09-08 04:39 PM



Spirit,
lightness of being
lioness
temptress
strength
equal
pearl
harmony
butterfly
companion
fingers on my brow
smile before evening

my laughter
my future, candle to my past

you swell and hold my tears
no one sees.

I'll carry you
to where doves correspond
into a song

stay beside me
above me
but never beneath me.

Woman.

© Copyright 2004 Daniel Storm - All Rights Reserved
sim0riah
Member
since 2004-09-07
Posts 253
Wyoming USA
1 posted 2004-09-08 04:49 PM


This one reminds me of something I truely believe and that is

To enjoy life you need to walk side by side with someone. If you walk ahead or the other behind, Can you really be there for each other through the hard times

Didn't really purposely intend for that to rhyme but that happens from time to time..

ok I'll stop now LOL

Very nicely done I liked it

sim0riah

Only at night you can see the depth of the sun

Sim0riah

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
2 posted 2004-09-08 05:03 PM


sim0riah, thanks for reading
Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
3 posted 2004-09-08 05:14 PM


Oh this is good.  Especially like: "my laughter
my future, candle to my past"

I'm looking forward to reading more of your stuff.


Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
4 posted 2004-09-08 05:29 PM





Thoroughly enjoyed your first post!!

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
5 posted 2004-09-08 06:41 PM


you're really kind for a guy who can't even construct a simple sentence (ROFL) thanks all.
iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
6 posted 2004-09-08 06:59 PM


Daniel, Welcome to Passions!  If I were the recepient of this poem, I would be so flattered.  I hope the woman you wrote this for was touched, as well.  
Susan
Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
7 posted 2004-09-08 07:14 PM


Oh Boy!  

Welcome to the pages blue.  Looking forward to reading more.

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you.  Joy is a state of mind.

Suetang
Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia
8 posted 2004-09-08 07:26 PM


Wow, Daniel!

You have given us such a wonderful first post and I'd like to welcome you to Passions.  I hope you enjoy your time here.

Take care........Sue

I am in motion
I am blue
Love is an ocean
I'm anchored in you
- Shawn Mullins

Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
9 posted 2004-09-08 07:39 PM


Welcome to Passions!  We are glad you have joined us.....Please, check
your E-mail for a Special Greeting!



Kindly~

Lauren~

I don’t want the world to see me
cause I don’t think that they’d understand
When everything’s made to be broken I just want you to know who I am

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
10 posted 2004-09-08 08:16 PM


Hey, you are all sweet. Thanks!
Contabo
Member
since 2001-11-21
Posts 159

11 posted 2004-09-08 08:42 PM


John Lennon said it all when he described woman as "the other half of the sky"

Contabo

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
12 posted 2004-09-08 09:28 PM


He sure did, thanks for commenting
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
13 posted 2004-09-08 10:03 PM


I'll carry you
to where doves correspond
into a song

~*~

You...are a young man of infinite possibilities...
Welcome to Passions!

Please...enjoy, interact...know the blue walls.  
You will be very much appreciated
for your talents!

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
14 posted 2004-09-08 10:20 PM


WOW!! WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!!
What a beautiful entrance post!
I can't wait to read more of your work.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~ Summer can't be over...
I still have the sand in my shoes. ~

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
15 posted 2004-09-08 10:44 PM


Sunshine, Enchantress (wow what names) I'm not that young but for that alone, I am indebted to your graceful comments. Thank you  
Tiersdin
Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364
east coast
16 posted 2004-09-08 11:07 PM


Beautifully said, Mr. Storm...

welcome!

~tier

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
17 posted 2004-09-08 11:10 PM


Hey, I appreciate that.  I'm just about inland by now Thanks for reading.
Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
18 posted 2004-09-08 11:30 PM


Nicely written Daniel,  the thoughts of
the other sex who certainly should stand
beside man,  not under or behind.  

Welcome to passions,  stay and continue to
write and share.

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
19 posted 2004-09-09 12:46 PM


Nice...James
Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
20 posted 2004-09-09 12:48 PM


Thanks guys. Appreciate the read.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
21 posted 2004-09-09 03:05 AM


awesome!
Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

22 posted 2004-09-09 08:52 AM


stay beside me
above me
but never beneath me.

This is so very beautiful in it's intend and message.  Very well done, and a lovely post for your first post. I am looking foward to much more from your pen. Welcome to Passions.

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
23 posted 2004-09-09 09:31 AM


Thanks. I'd no idea anyone would even red it I appreciate the comments.
LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

24 posted 2004-09-09 10:19 AM


you swell and hold my tears
no one sees.


in my single life have had the opportunity to meet many people...some forms of life, some intellectual wonders, some artists of future spendor, some only concerned about the moment, some self-imposed, some caring and needy....
but you, well simply this...I have come to know that a lot of the good men have already been taken...but in these words, you see what women also crave, it isn't about any material thing, but understanding the individuality of that person, not wanting to change it, or govern it, but compliment it....learn from it, teach it, and explore together great answers to meanings....tremendous write

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
25 posted 2004-09-09 10:50 AM


Daniel, this was a wonderful first post!  Welcome!

Susan

"cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind"
~Sarah McLachlan~

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
26 posted 2004-09-09 12:03 PM


Thanks, really you guys are super. Now, if I can get my other poetry cleaned up I can post something else.
Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
27 posted 2004-09-09 02:08 PM


Lee, I wanted to come back and say your reply moved me. I do try to see things from a woman's point of view. Maybe b/c I had so many sisters. Anyway, thank you and everyone again.
MGROVES
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802
california
28 posted 2004-09-09 04:19 PM


welcome to passions  
very good  cant wait to see more


Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
29 posted 2004-09-09 05:27 PM


Thanks, I appreciate that. Folks are really kind.
Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182
Netherlands
30 posted 2004-09-09 05:49 PM



Oh wow, a very welcome to the Passion's blue pages Daniel.

Lucky lady she will be. Great write, enjoyed it much.

Titia

Like scattered leaves...my words will flow

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
31 posted 2004-09-09 05:57 PM


Titia, thanks and I'm the lucky one
littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
32 posted 2004-09-10 04:05 PM


Daniel?

Welcome to PIP!

This is amazing, something
Lennon would be proud of!

A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart
33 posted 2004-09-10 05:06 PM


Yours words are as if God himself spoke them when he created woman...Beautiful!

Reminds me of John Lennon song...

~Love and hugs
~ARh

Come,love all of me, mind, body, spirit..feel my passion, taste of me, be filled completely!


Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
34 posted 2004-09-10 09:11 PM


Whoah, Lennon and God in the same sentence. You're both kind and I thank you. This has been a very pleasant experience!
miscellanea
Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060
OH
35 posted 2004-09-11 04:31 PM


Daniel,
  Welcome to Passions!  What an enjoyable
first post!  I'm looking forward to reading many more!

I'll carry you
to where doves correspond
into a song

stay beside me
above me
but never beneath me.

Woman.

NICE!

       miscellanea

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
36 posted 2004-09-12 12:32 PM


Hey, I appreciate you guys. I really do. You're all really friendly.
ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
37 posted 2004-09-19 01:51 PM


Daniel:
I must apologize for missing your entrance piece...as it is indeed a wonderful and thoughtful gift to share...
I am glad I saw the other one first, because it brought me to an understanding that I might have missed the other way round.

Welcome again...and I look forward to reading you.
TD

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
38 posted 2004-09-19 02:02 PM


Hey, TD, I just got your email. Thanks. Makes me feel great that you got what you did from (both) pieces. I appreciate that!
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
39 posted 2004-09-19 02:08 PM


Daniel

Welcome to Passions...Your first post showed a sensitive understanding of woman, and woman sure do appreciate that!

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
40 posted 2004-09-19 04:25 PM


Martie, thanks.  Well, they've given me so much (I mean) you know
devinechild22
Senior Member
since 2002-08-28
Posts 571

41 posted 2004-09-20 12:21 PM


Let's just say.. with that write.. YOU HAVE BECOME MY NEW BEST FRIEND!


                  *Allison*


~~~***~~~Come away with me, Wendy. Come away to Neverland~~~***~~~

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
42 posted 2004-09-20 08:37 AM


...ah, would this be the view of every man
Welcome to Passions

kayjay
Member Elite
since 2002-06-24
Posts 2015
Oregon
43 posted 2004-09-20 09:02 AM


I think LeeJ said it all in that you've crystallized what a woman wants and deserves from her man.  Well said and also, welcome!!
Ken

Through rubble and trouble and dark of night
The yawn of a dawn will hasten the light

Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
44 posted 2004-09-20 09:14 AM


You're really kknd, now I'm trusting you ladies all have this type of fella in your life right?  I sure hope so!  Thanks so much for the warm reception.
Mon Cherie
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922
Land of Never-ending Summers
45 posted 2004-09-20 10:53 AM


This is a beautiful first post...

Welcome to Passions!

_,,,^.^,,,_
Florence

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
46 posted 2004-09-20 10:59 AM


You write as a man who knows, understands, loves and appreciates a "Woman"!

~ and that kind of man is my kind of poet! Or should I say, "that kind of poet is my kind of man!" lol

Warm, welcoming hugs,
Earth Angel

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
47 posted 2004-09-20 11:11 AM


welcome to passions enjoy your read
Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
48 posted 2004-09-20 03:09 PM


Thank you and your thoughts really lift me today.
J.Samm
Member
since 2004-01-12
Posts 415
Iloilo City, Philippines
49 posted 2004-09-21 01:40 AM


i love it, especially the "but never beneath me" part. welcome to the forums. i'm sure you'll like it here!
Daniel Storm
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 91
New York
50 posted 2004-09-21 08:43 AM


Thanks, appreciate that a lot.
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #33 » Woman

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary