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Open Poetry #33
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Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095


0 posted 2004-08-16 05:32 PM


August winds howl around your sleeping
I sit at our window watching fields of space
looking out for that fly-by passion of yours
it never seems to show itself to me.

I cannot bear to lay aloof and stare  
at this dream I am grieving while it awaits
patiently for my leaving
all wound up like the fat belly of a little Ben
filled with alarm
waiting
waiting for that thievish hour
when it steals me from you.

I love you
sometimes I don’t
though you might find that incomprehensible
it is true, I think.
What does it matter if I love you or not
my skin doesn’t get any warmer
and it’s through nights like this one
I wish I didn’t.



The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change.
~Stevie Nicks~

© Copyright 2004 Dark Angel - All Rights Reserved
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
1 posted 2004-08-16 06:04 PM


looking out for that fly-by passion of yours
it never seems to show itself to me.

I love you
sometimes I don’t
though you might find that incomprehensible
it is true, I think.
What does it matter if I love you or not
my skin doesn’t get any warmer
and it’s through nights like this one
I wish I didn’t.


your words spoke to me even if a repost~~~

M

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

2 posted 2004-08-16 06:19 PM


"What does it matter if I love you or not
my skin doesn’t get any warmer"

this line... well.. it made me stop and think twice...



iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
3 posted 2004-08-16 08:02 PM


Maree, this leaves me wanting to go get my sweater....no really, I could just picture you looking out the window, with a full moon and a cold chill, wind, maybe storm, and then having these thoughts.   ....jo
muted
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving
4 posted 2004-08-17 12:07 PM


"I cannot bear to lay aloof and stare  
at this dream I am grieving while it awaits
patiently for my leaving"



yes yes, this right here...thats how it feels!
oh Maria, your repost is sooo touching, and bittersweet.....reaches deep into me.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2004-08-17 03:38 AM


gawd! that aches!
Kevo
Member
since 2004-06-02
Posts 466
Navarro County, Texas, USA
6 posted 2004-08-17 04:38 AM


I spent the last month away trying to get my computer back up and running anticipating the opportunity to catch up on your posts as well as a few others that leave my jaw on the floor.  Your talent never ceases to amaze me.  Your feelings are well communicated as are the unforgettable pictures you so deftly paint.  You have a refreshing way of writing that is very real and captivating.  I always enjoy reading and watching for your posts.  This one is a heartbreaker.  I hope things have changed for you.  I am glad you reposted it.  I never would have had the opportunity to read it.  It's brilliant as always.

Warm regards,

Big K

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
7 posted 2004-08-17 12:11 PM



a picture removed
from a picure...

well done, little one.

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

8 posted 2004-08-17 12:42 PM


I cannot bear to lay aloof and stare  
at this dream I am grieving while it awaits
patiently for my leaving
all wound up like the fat belly of a little Ben
filled with alarm
waiting
waiting for that thievish hour
when it steals me from you.


profound detail from a deep passion...extremely well written, felt the anquish and yet, the hope of someday mutually meeting forever.  


Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
9 posted 2004-08-17 02:11 PM


Maree

As always your imagery paints emotion....and leaves me feeling your feeling.  You are a gifted poet!  

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
10 posted 2004-08-18 11:39 AM


For one reason or another, I think this is one of your best Darksis.


Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

11 posted 2004-08-18 04:55 PM


Thank you all, you're so very kind with your thoughts and comments, I appreciate them so much, Thanks for stopping by...even for a repost.



Maree

The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change.
~Stevie Nicks~

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

12 posted 2004-08-18 05:39 PM


I'm afraid I can't help but tell you how very much I love this poem. Personally, I think it's the best you've written Maree.

K

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

13 posted 2004-08-18 09:04 PM


I understand this one...curse them that I love at times and me for loving, just 'cause it hurts.

(if that made sense)

Love you, lovely, and thanks for the song.

Jamie
Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168
Blue Heaven
14 posted 2004-08-21 08:14 AM


quote:
I understand this one...curse them that I love at times and me for loving, just 'cause it hurts.


* It's nice sometimes
          to open up the heart a little
and let some hurt come in.
It proves you're still alive.

*rod mckuen

J

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
15 posted 2004-08-21 08:40 AM


Love the ambiguity and depth of this one

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
16 posted 2004-08-21 10:09 AM


I love you
sometimes I don’t
though you might find that incomprehensible
it is true, I think.
What does it matter if I love you or not
my skin doesn’t get any warmer
and it’s through nights like this one
I wish I didn’t.

This aches...and resonates. Just these lines would make this poem a certain addition to my library....sad but beautiful and so true to life.

Every line of this poem breathes with a life of its own...and I love little Ben, making his tinny threat every second of the night!

....but....I miss your picture...snif...

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
17 posted 2004-08-21 10:12 AM


Said I would, then didn't...ain't that just like a man?

Now I am -- Presto Librario!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
18 posted 2004-08-21 01:09 PM


Nice writing bella, you make ache beautiful
Verve
Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 348
Singapore
19 posted 2004-08-21 02:17 PM


i can fully relate to ur words... the ongoing dilemma...  its d exact thing i am going thru right now...

i really liked this piece.  


"Who knows what evil lurks in the heart of Man?"

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