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Open Poetry #33
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Catagory 5's
| Open Poetry #33 |
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Catagory 5's |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296
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Category 5 And here was a thicker air of silence Injured, unsupported staircase Ornately carved, turning back, holding tighter In perplexity, afraid to reform Warm currents coaxed from the depths Full ceremonial fish on moonless nights Perceptions stopped, deafening cleaver riptides Forearms shamefully on the bar of typhoons Uncapping sharp, long neck bottles Mocking salutes, in the name of Idols Deep-breathed non-fiction, comes to life Cooking and eating at campfires symbolic While sparks from the fire screams “You are infected!” But could not be reached for comment Vulgarity erupts louder then before Kidnapped Journalists, work from home Smacking a sound on the radio Taking drug tests, learning about threats BBC Crew Held by Israeli soldiers But let the Games begin? An exorbitant sum of money Can immediately be found by Scanning your system with spy ware Depending on the festivities of talk show hosts Climbing into a hand controlled wheel chair Hurtling sound back up the ramp…imprinted Shaking states for limitations, her legs imposed Keeping her in the dark, but she stands by his side Engaging in adult consensual affairs Interiors gutted by harpoons of contributions Whirling winds of tempest tinged sorrow While low country boys find clear water Finding the ocean’s depth at a thousand feet Across a doglike land Ice burgs in the shipping lanes of amusement parks Baiting up, measuring success by size and numbers Disappearing consciousness….. Hurling capers spreading like disease Each party serves the worst food ever eaten Hiding impeccable movements underground Sea creatures hovering, brown bookies Suffocating with hand in pocket reform Spreading briny salt-water ominously, Checking depth meters, pitching underbelly tsunamis Walking on two feet, praising the lost continent Land of the Free?…..Flooding in a pool of Category 5’s |
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| © Copyright 2004 Lee J. - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
You cover a lot of ground with this poem, perhaps too much? Perhaps not, I'm a simplistic writer, taking a topic at a time. You say a lot and say it well Gloom |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
nope gloom your right, my mind skips around like several stones over water, running away with me...always had the problem of thinking out loud, trying to absorb so much information...becoming very enthusiastic... Your right, and thanks kindly for the caring way you've expressed the flaw...I'll try harder...b/c I want to...smiles and hugs |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
news channel and a lady with fuzzy slippers running fast forward with her eyes kewl expression of media-cane |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I know that skip... focusing is not always easy... be a bird find your prey and zero in to that long flight earthward. |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Yep, you cover a lot of ground ( I think each of your stanza's could have been developed into a piece of their own) but . . . I think that's also one of the big draws of your work - because one never knows what's coming next and what comes next is always so well written one tends to overlook what you termed a "flaw". A flaw which leaves one envious of what you've wrought. Personally, if I could write as well as you, knowing my work to be flawed would be wonderful. jimmy |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
cool, eyes with fuzzy slippers, I can see that...hugs D Sunshine...happy Friday and wishing you a great day... Good morning guys, wishing you a great day |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
hey Jimmy, good morning, hugs...your very kind, but you do write as well as me, all of you do, even better...or at least that's my way of seeing things... smiles and hugs to all of you...have a wonderful day ahead |
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
Lee J All I can think to say is: “You Da Bomb!” Great write! JL  |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
JL, your mincemeat....hehehhehee...NOW CUT THAT OUT Sending hugs your way, happy Friday |
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miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
LeeJ., When I read your work, it sends me rushing straight to the emotional level, without an inkling of where I've been. You have your own beautiful style, but sometimes it doesn't linger with me because I can't establish one setting to walk within in my mind. It is exquisite for the moment I read it. Upon occasions, I've related more to it than others. I believe it was more to one topic with underlying layers then. However, the style you have immerses me in fast emotion like no other. I'd say, it's a toss up. Do whatever is comfortable to you. You will have an audience regardless. miscellanea |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Lee I love the way you write, the way you let your mind put all you think into words, no matter how short or long, it is always such a delight to look into your thoughts and life. Hugs. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
"Full ceremonial fish on moonless nights" ~ I must assume that you eat your weight in fish every day to keep your poetic brain so sharp! Those Omega 3s are worth their weight in precious oil! lol Have a great day! Linda  |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Misc...your way to kind...and you've left me speechless, can you imagine that, me speechless? To be candid, flattery will get you everywhere, hehehhehe, wishing to thank you for your lovely comment...adding, I've still got a long ways to go until I can catch up to you guys, but it's fun trying...smiles and hugs and thanks for your support. Gentle Spirit...you are a treasure, thanks a bunch...hugs...sending the same back your way...and hope you baton down the hatches in your neck of the woods....are you ready for the rain? EA...well then, better start eating a lot of fish, and I mean alot...Sushi anyone? hehehehe Many thanks to all of you for your comments, and wishing you a great weekend ahead. |
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Pell Member
since 2001-09-16
Posts 134Pacific NW |
That's a big meal to tuck into, but I really do enjoy the glimpse into your mind, the free-association. I admire the way you can open up and share the chaos without vulnerability. Better out than in, right? A great weekend to you as well. |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Hey Pell, G'day, yes, I suppose your right, but I've very passionate about reform within our country...thanks for taking the time to read and comment...take care |
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