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Open Poetry #33
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Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

0 posted 2004-08-09 02:09 PM



{Recollections of a winter’s journal}
~~**~~

Reflections and then night

better still grains of sand

on an empty shorelines   yet

somehow we are the same

delicate and soft

searching for beauty  in

swirling patterns

There’s a broken dream upon
the sea  if you listen with your soul
you can hear her flight

amidst the clouds
petals were falling  

I bent down to touch
silk meaning, while
blue veils went unrecognized --

wishing for you to- -

sing to me of the moon and sky
tell of this journey
over and over again

for hours I stood
listening


                      I’m alone in this infinite charm


in the wake of dust
we’ll dance tonight holding  stars - -
gathering memories  of heart

                your beauty, stirred  wind
                 haunting my eyes

Your whisper, I bury in my soul
tucked against pressed palms
and gentle fingers

Leave the roses in their box
let  rain scatter their ashes in
rhythms of wind and water
they  will eventually make way back to
sea  

here,- - now,  we are

branches swaying side by side in darkness
waiting for a winter’s visit    

I embrace  this  feeling
and miss your  mere silhouette
moments such as these

leave me

--lonely and searching
for your hands



I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone though you're still with me
I've been alone all along..Now I'm bound by the life you left behind

© Copyright 2004 Lauren~ - All Rights Reserved
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

1 posted 2004-08-09 02:15 PM


as usual.. you leave me in awe...

wonderful write my friend..and with your usual style.. something to be read and pondered.. savored.. and then reread.. to do it again

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

2 posted 2004-08-09 02:26 PM


Reflections and then night

better still grains of sand

on an empty shorelines   yet

somehow we are the same

delicate and soft

searching for beauty  in

swirling patterns

my sister...
oh my my my....
you tug...so lightly...

Susan
Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
3 posted 2004-08-09 02:32 PM


This piece is simply stunning.

  Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you.  Joy is a state of mind.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

4 posted 2004-08-09 02:42 PM


"in the wake of dust
we’ll dance tonight holding  stars - -
gathering memories  of heart"

and what a gorgeous dirvish dancer you'd make too!

this is beauty, sweet Lauren.

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
5 posted 2004-08-09 03:19 PM


~ "There’s a broken dream upon
  the sea  if you listen with your soul
  you can hear her flight"

~ "Leave the roses in their box
  let  rain scatter their ashes in
  rhythms of wind and water
  they  will eventually make way back to
  sea"

Be there no doubt, you are a poetess of the highest order!

Flower
EA  

froggy
Senior Member
since 2003-06-23
Posts 1893
Michigan
6 posted 2004-08-09 03:48 PM


Beautiful is all I can think of.

:-)

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

7 posted 2004-08-09 04:21 PM


I bent down to touch
silk meaning, while
blue veils went unrecognized --


~~~~~~~~~
in the wake of dust
we’ll dance tonight holding  stars - -
gathering memories  of heart

                your beauty, stirred  wind
                 haunting my eyes

Your whisper, I bury in my soul
tucked against pressed palms
and gentle fingers

Leave the roses in their box
let  rain scatter their ashes in
rhythms of wind and water
they  will eventually make way back to
sea  

here,- - now,  we are

branches swaying side by side in darkness
waiting for a winter’s visit    

I embrace  this  feeling
and miss your  mere silhouette
moments such as these

leave me

--lonely and searching
for your hands

===========================
*sigh*
how can i pick fav verses when i feel every word....time and time again you haunt me lovely....your muse is enchanting and lovely poetess L.

eor
Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959
blues & greys
8 posted 2004-08-09 07:44 PM


  I’m alone in this infinite charm


broken down to a phrase, this is perfect!

Pimpin and panderin, on a level you can't serve, dismantle, nouns, pronouns, adverbs, and verbs

Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

9 posted 2004-08-09 10:39 PM


"for hours I stood
listening
"

or longer perhaps . . .

I may have to borrow that line,
if I can find a way through it



iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
10 posted 2004-08-09 10:47 PM


"There’s a broken dream upon
the sea  if you listen with your soul
you can hear her flight"



Lauren, this was beautifully haunting.  You have a gift at doing that!   ....jo

aujussy wolf
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2003-08-09
Posts 1215
Michigan
11 posted 2004-08-09 11:16 PM


hotty poem , this would keep anyone warm in the winter lol  ...your words kindle a warm fire
wolfy

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
12 posted 2004-08-10 03:52 AM


incredible!
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