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Open Poetry #33
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icebox
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383
in the shadows

0 posted 2004-07-27 11:32 PM



I stood out in the rain tonight,
a hard rain,
jungle rain blown off course,
I must have
needed brief discourse with gremlins
in the sub-basements of my soul,
I found myself
counting time,
between lightning and thunder no sense of wonder
about why I stood out
under the bleeding sky,
as the storm ripped it asunder,
closed my eyes to realize I was washed
within a time warp standing still
in hard warm rain pounding on my brain,
I was anywhere but here and now;
don't ask me how,
sometimes
it is a soft and gentle scent
spalled within awareness
that draws me hence,
sometimes  
it is a violent storm called to rend my senses
and my mind,
to free some of my own bolts of lightning,
stored away
down with the gremlins
and leftover pain,
I guess against a rainy day;
anyway,
my soul called,
my body went
grabbed my mind,
and all of us slipped through time again
doesn't matter off to when,
I was young
again,
freshly blooded,
in a heavy jungle rain.

©2004 by icebox

© Copyright 2004 icebox - All Rights Reserved
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
1 posted 2004-07-28 12:14 PM


icebox

slanted time comes along from a small tap on shoulder from many different things, it seems. An experience that can be good, or not, depending on where and when.  I hope your journey was a peaceful one.  

lgina
Member
since 2004-07-20
Posts 52

2 posted 2004-07-28 12:35 PM


icebox,  i to have stood in the jungle rain.
iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
3 posted 2004-07-28 01:13 AM


Thank you very much for my late night snack from the Icebox.  I very much enjoy your writing.  Very fine lightening bolts and glad you penned 'em, my friend!  We all have our gremlins but the rain can wash, yes.  *wink* *smile* ...jo
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
4 posted 2004-07-28 04:17 AM


oh that rain *sigh*
Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
5 posted 2004-07-28 04:41 AM


I never understood why people run to get out of the rain...I love it.

affirmation!

"cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind"
~Sarah McLachlan~

Susan
Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
6 posted 2004-07-28 03:03 PM


This conveys a lot.  Especially in the down pour.

  Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you.  Joy is a state of mind.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
7 posted 2004-07-28 03:20 PM


"anyway,
my soul called,
my body went
grabbed my mind,
and all of us slipped through time again
doesn't matter off to when,
I was young
again,
freshly blooded,
in a heavy jungle rain."

I so very much enjoyed this...
Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
Dancing with you in the summer rain ~

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
8 posted 2004-07-28 03:40 PM


rain is life
we are the rain too afterall

Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

9 posted 2004-07-28 03:50 PM


Simply?
Doesn't sound like it.


Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

10 posted 2004-07-28 06:09 PM


Kraw is on to something... is it ever simply..?

Ratleader
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Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
11 posted 2004-07-29 12:40 PM


Well, now we have proof you're not a turkey....they look up trying to see where those drops are coming from....and drown.

The gremlin thing? Aye, I've fought 'em and I've had long talks with 'em. Learned from both, but never figured out which I preferred.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Kahlil
Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881

12 posted 2004-07-29 01:14 AM


"my soul called,
my body went
grabbed my mind,
and all of us slipped through time again"

I love it when that happens...usually...

dgvarner
Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida
13 posted 2004-10-09 04:57 PM


hmm...enjoyed that...the sound of it..the way it flowed..the words...


hugs, g

"Everybody just wants to get high...sit and watch a perfect world go by..." (T.McGraw)

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

14 posted 2004-10-09 06:23 PM


This made me sigh, me thinks I'll do the same when our next storm hits downunder, a cleansing of my aura may do me good....as did reading your poem

Enjoyed.

Maree

cuz fate is not just whose cooking smells good
but which way the wind blows

~ani difranco~

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
15 posted 2004-10-09 06:27 PM



Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia
16 posted 2004-10-10 01:18 AM


enjoyed the read - you are inspirational in your writing I can learn much!

Roniece Dawson-Bruce

jennirey
Member
since 2002-01-24
Posts 198
North Richland HillsTx
17 posted 2004-10-10 02:24 AM


Before reading this I add, that I too found myself wandering in a drizzle of sorts tonight. It felt good, I kept walking then half way out the rain became hard and fierce and cold. Glad you had a good walk and talk with yours. I think I merely got wet.

jennirey

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
18 posted 2004-10-10 09:11 AM


IceBox~

'the sub-basements of my soul'

Oh my ... is that rich imagery~

I found that I enjoyed the little nuance internal mind-rhymes that I found in this~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram <))><

Email noles1@totcon.com

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
19 posted 2004-10-10 10:46 AM


liked this
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
20 posted 2004-10-10 06:32 PM


I really enjoyed the subject matter here and also the sound of it, the internal rhyme.
Very well done.
Liz

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
21 posted 2004-10-10 06:52 PM


wonderfully rhythmic--I felt the pelting of the rain...'cept I got to stay dry and think about the why? you asked

yet standing in the rain is often exactly what we need, isn't it!

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

Skyfire
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
22 posted 2004-10-10 11:20 PM


I can't pinpoint exactly why, but I just loved reading this   Thanks for the read ^_^

and then He created the horse...

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