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Open Poetry #33
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Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast

0 posted 2004-07-27 08:27 AM



broken toe statues
of soccer mom's
tying shoes
on little boys
with fast car dreams

they have viagra
in their eyes
and novocain smiles
can hear the texture there
of their tongues on teeth

when they swim their spoons
in some africa
with cardboard cups
dressed up as trees
and dragonflys

red curbs are for parking
grays are for pidgin speak
and seagull sequels
and the parking lot pies
are machine gun dialogues

between wanna be drummed hummers

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Dark



© Copyright 2004 ©Dark 2k - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2004-07-27 08:34 AM


You probably won't believe what floated
in my imagination as I swam through this...

ever extraordinary, you are...

Susan
Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
2 posted 2004-07-27 08:49 AM


How often shall I tell you how fascinating I find your words and the metaphors you use.  The feel of your work, the way you word life, it is intriguing and I enjoy your unique perspective.  This is no exception-

  Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you.  Joy is a state of mind.

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

3 posted 2004-07-27 08:49 AM


amazing, the visuals you create

while reading, one thing jumped out at me...the dragonfly.

Have you seen that movie..."Dragonfly"?
If not you should, a must see...

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
4 posted 2004-07-27 09:04 AM


Ms sunshine...what floated in your mind..hmmmmmmmm the little radio controled CrisCraft boats on the pond at the park?  Thanks to you ms


_______________

Ms Susan, friend doka, arrigoto for your eye touch songs in reply
_____________

Ms LeeJ, have not seen the movie, but dragonflys are special, perhaps I will soon, thanks for the read and review and for calling me banana (grin)

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
5 posted 2004-07-27 09:15 AM


Actually nothing as serene as Criss Crafts...

but more of a floating of ages between young boys and old men, then back again, and the women who would care for them through all ages...

and lots of color...

Kahlil
Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881

6 posted 2004-07-27 09:54 AM


...smiling at your images in my mind's eye...
rwood
Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793
Tennessee
7 posted 2004-07-27 10:14 AM


Hey D! Your Pacifica is a language all to its own. Could feel how the edges of the concrete jungle made cliffside worthy of jumping, or at least looking at through  your vision. As long as you're there.

Love,
Reg


passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
8 posted 2004-07-27 01:05 PM


neat write
Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
9 posted 2004-07-27 02:25 PM


yes, a banana
unsplit


delicious imagery
but LOL at the hummers

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
10 posted 2004-07-27 02:31 PM


Dark Stranger
"So what's a meta for?" LOL

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
11 posted 2004-07-27 02:40 PM


Oh for the love of...

Someone send me the cliff notes???

DS~ I love your stuff...but honestly, I don't understand this one!  



Help me?

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
12 posted 2004-07-27 08:39 PM


DS

Like film clips fast forward, stop, rewind....you draw this like an art...and I'll bet it only took you a few minutes...and lots of looking deeply at things.  

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
13 posted 2004-07-27 08:58 PM



they have viagra
in their eyes
and novocain smiles
can hear the texture there
of their tongues on teeth

beware when the soccermom goes wild........

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
14 posted 2004-07-27 10:35 PM


I think the Inked One understands this one.  I got the same message.  Your poems are puzzles with surprises.  But there ain't no bananas.  Dragonfly is a great movie, by the way.
Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
15 posted 2004-07-28 08:56 AM


gang...mall thirty at the pacific view where the soccer moms yack and stack starbucks and the latest oprah...and get a bit rowdy when they wrestle over a parking place for the bigbuckmobiles..... just a snapshot...and thanks to you all for the reads and replies to my scribbles


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