navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #33 » In The Eyes
Open Poetry #33
Post A Reply Post New Topic In The Eyes Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California

0 posted 2004-07-12 06:29 PM



He asked me a question
just a few words strung together
made from big things he watches come and go
and knowledge of things that stay

He said that light is always heat
and life        spirit
but where
he wondered in the quiz of his blue eyes
where in the chain of things
all strung together to form a road
where does happiness go

I knew he had seen it
for if he hadn’t he wouldn’t realize its passing

I had asked it so often myself
that the words were memorized
in my heart

Happiness is fleeting
just happenstance and serendipity on the road map
places you pass by so quickly that you just can’t blink
not ever
or you miss them

Sometimes there are other places
the tall joy of a tree and boy with seaweed
in the pathway
but there is always wind and waves to change them
and soon they are not what they meant

The trick is in the eyes

© Copyright 2004 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
1 posted 2004-07-12 06:57 PM


Martie
The trick is in the message behind the eyes.
Enjoyed the read.

Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
2 posted 2004-07-12 07:46 PM


Perfection ... as always.
hugs, Chris

   Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale.
                                          Hans Christian Anderson

James_A_Fraser
Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972
Out Making Anticlines
3 posted 2004-07-12 08:36 PM


Going is one thing -- arriving is quite another, and wherever a poem of yours comes from it's a pleasure to read. Thank you for taking that simply expressed question and making it a work of art.



~~J

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
4 posted 2004-07-12 09:07 PM


Martie,  if you could see my eyes,  you
might glance a bit of moistness,  perhaps
a little added gleam from it....for these
words touch me,  but that isn't new, is it?
When it comes to your poetry.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
5 posted 2004-07-12 09:16 PM


Beautifully penned dear Martie...
Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
Dancing with you in the summer rain ~

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

6 posted 2004-07-13 06:15 AM


Happiness is fleeting
just happenstance and serendipity on the road map
places you pass by so quickly that you just can’t blink
not ever
or you miss them


I can remember this happiness you speak of which wasn't fleeting...for a while...and it
was consistently a blessing to this very day...and enough to sustain a lifetime.  

Glorious sight you have...you are an elegant writer...and poetess...
Thank you for sharing.

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
7 posted 2004-07-13 06:52 AM


He said that light is always heat
and life        spirit
but where
he wondered in the quiz of his blue eyes
where in the chain of things
all strung together to form a road
where does happiness go

~*~

You made me think that Happiness
must be a small town somewhere near you...

and you musn't blink...
so that it is felt, heard, known...
in the eyes...


passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
8 posted 2004-07-13 12:58 PM


yes it is

this is precious

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
9 posted 2004-07-13 01:14 PM


but where
he wondered in the quiz of his blue eyes
where in the chain of things
all strung together to form a road
where does happiness go

If only there was an operation to stop the blink... but sometimes open eyes only mean seeing the leaving.

Excellent write!

icebox
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383
in the shadows
10 posted 2004-07-13 01:22 PM


*smile*

In the days of the ancient Roman Empire, when it was still a Republic, when one of its citizen/generals came home in triumph there would be a big celebration and a parade.  In this parade the citizen/general would ride in a golden chariot with a slave behind him.  The parade route would be lined with the good citizens of The City and the path would be strewn with flower petals and aromatic herbs; it would be a glorious triumphal parade.  The slave stading behind the hero would hold a laurel wreath above citizen/general's head (a symbal of greatness), but the slave's job also included that from time to time along the parade route he was to whisper in the great man's ear, reminding him, "All glory is fleeting."

Perhaps it is so with happiness.


JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
11 posted 2004-07-13 01:35 PM


"The trick is in the eyes"

Hummm...

Great write.

JL


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

12 posted 2004-07-14 07:59 AM


He asked me a question
just a few words strung together
made from big things he watches come and go
and knowledge of things that stay

He said that light is always heat
and life        spirit
=============================

where does happiness go

I knew he had seen it
for if he hadn’t he wouldn’t realize its passing

I had asked it so often myself
that the words were memorized
in my heart
=========================


hard to respond to the depth and truths of this beautiful write....

just know the moth was here....feeling every word.

I would love to live as a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding.

~Fluent~
John O'Donohue

kayjay
Member Elite
since 2002-06-24
Posts 2015
Oregon
13 posted 2004-07-15 11:19 AM


"The trick is in the eyes"

What a show stopping last line; it makes the whole poem.  It is a great closer, with lots of hidden meanings.  Well done, Martie!!  Ken

Through rubble and trouble and dark of night
The yawn of a dawn will hasten the light

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

14 posted 2004-07-15 11:24 AM


beautiful ... just as you are...

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
15 posted 2004-07-15 01:18 PM


Yes, the "trick is in the eyes."  Absolutely wonderful poem, Martie.  I so enjoyed this write so full of truth.   ....jo
Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
16 posted 2004-07-16 03:06 AM


Yes, it's in the eyes that are connected to the heart, and if we're lucky, we will keep them open!!  Martie, it was so good to read you.....~S~

Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
17 posted 2004-07-16 07:10 AM


eyes?  yes, and you wear shades to keep the secrets?  way cool write ms martie
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
18 posted 2004-07-16 06:10 PM


Wonderful! Best thing I've read lately, Martie!


Corinne

Goodknight
Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386
Ohio, USA
19 posted 2004-07-17 11:02 AM


I read and am amazed again at the wonderful talent you possess Martie - Paul
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #33 » In The Eyes

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary