Hang in their, it will get better.
I know exactly how you feel.
I've been their girlfriend!
Pish Posh! Rubbish all... I do not know exactly how you feel, I have not been there, and I don't know you well enough to know if you are writing of yourself, or just writing.
I do know that I have felt similarly in my life, and that your writing depicted that state quite clearly and eloquently.
I like what you have done, it touches my heart and I enjoyed the read. Please keep more coming for us to enjoy
And yes... for all those who have taken offense at this reply; I was being sarcastic (and snotty) for a reason, although I will leave it to you to understand.
Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
"Everything is your own damn fault, if you are any good." E. Hemmingway