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Dark Poetry #1
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Profile of a Dead Man
| Dark Poetry #1 |
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Profile of a Dead Man |
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Jana Tovey Member
since 2000-05-30
Posts 257USA |
When he was but a baby his mother gave him to her tired, old mother to raise him as her own. Mother kept his older brother, and the baby boy that came after him... But he was never welcomed back into the fold. When he started school he could never focus on how to write or read, or how to solve his problems. Instead he thought of ways to get attention, how to demand the center stage... the scoldings as well as the praise he’d welcome. And when he couldn’t get the intensity that he needed he looked for them elsewhere - in a girl, who’d known her share of strife. In her he saw his mother, not his wife, and when she could not fulfill his needs he paid her with a slap, a push, a shove until she found a knife. Now she skulks in a corner awaiting what will come she couldn’t take another beating she had nowhere to run. In him she’d sensed a hunger, she never knew how strong, he was the dad she’d never pleased, the cycle just goes on.... |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jana Tovey - All Rights Reserved | |||
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a-alibaster Member
since 2000-01-08
Posts 392 |
If only I could tell you how strongly these words speak to me...how many times, as he slept, I watched him silently, and plotted his death...no, I never went that far... but upon my blackened soul...he,forever, has left a gapping vile scar!! I got away... and have gone on...but never believe for one second that it is easy... Good read dear! There is an alter ego which dwells in every soul... a-alibaster |
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Swåmp¤Faerÿie Member
since 2000-03-29
Posts 358Illinois |
This is excellent!! My um has always warned me about men who want you to be their mother,ot their wife. It's a real element to consider,this poem was well put. The words describe exactly the condition,and it's very sad. swamp faeryie And there she weaves by night and day, a magic web of colours gay.~Tennyson |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
Great work hon. But I cannot say I agree totally!! In many instances the cycle does indeed go on, but some have the will, want and/or education to not carry on the cycle. They are little heroes for that feat alone. It's all very well to blame the mother in this boy's case, but the mother did not make him hit or hurt the girl..... Thanks for the diffent outlook you've brought in here it is a breath of fresh air  I'll tell you this...... No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn..... ~Isis~ (Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit) |
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Joel the wolf Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333Angels Camp |
Yes my friend I do agree with Isis, I broke a cycle with my abusive dad, I told my children I loved them every day as they grew. it can be broken. Love your work kid. Joel. I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel. |
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fractal007 Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958 |
That was a very good poem! It sounds a lot like what happens where I live. It's one of the major problems that we, as humans face. |
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Jana Tovey Member
since 2000-05-30
Posts 257USA |
Thanks for all of these comments. I think cycles can be broken, too, but what a shame about the ones that aren't. Everyone is a victim in these situations. |
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