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JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

0 posted 2000-03-27 01:59 AM


The way I feel

Just to put you on alert
I've had it up to here with your hurt.
Guess what...my feelings do matter
so take your selfish thoughts and scatter.
Send no fresh doses of pain my way
or I'll stamp "return to sender" the very same day.
You and I both know you were never there for me.
Truth is you never even cared for me.
It's true...at one time my love was real...
but yours was not..so I must change the way I feel.
To make this as clear as I possibly can
it's supposed to be man loves woman
and woman loves man.
So over and out is my final cry.
No more tears and no more lies.
A love that tried has failed and died.

Jameslee@March26,2000
overandout

© Copyright 2000 JamesMichael - All Rights Reserved
Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
1 posted 2000-03-27 02:20 AM


I can relate to the bitterness and the frustration that leads to "giving up".  You have my empathies on this one.


michael

StarrGazer
Senior Member
since 2000-03-05
Posts 679
Texas
2 posted 2000-03-27 08:56 AM


can relate all too well...
You and I both know you were never there for me.
Truth is you never even cared for me.
It's true...at one time my love was real...
but yours was not..so I must change the way I feel.

if this were only as simple as writing it on paper ... ((((hugz))))   great emotion in this poem

 "A poet is one who spends a lifetime standing out in thunderstorms, waiting to be hit by lightning"
~Randal Jarrell~



ZuMBLe
Junior Member
since 2000-03-27
Posts 33

3 posted 2000-03-27 10:15 AM


Wow, that was refreshing.  Love it.  =)  It really gets out the bottled up frustration in loving someone who doesn't care.  I know it actually freed me up for a little while.  But did you write this as an exit for anger, or is it truth?  I've written things out of anger and frustration and when I stepped back to read it.  I realize that I don't really mean a word of it.  But it captures the moment in time when I wrote it.  So thats good too.. =)

ZuMBLe

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
4 posted 2000-03-27 03:23 PM


Thank you Michael I appreciate your concern.
StarrGazer so true...but it is necessary to take a position and follow your heart.
Zumble I wrote this to help me accept the truth and with a desire to leave the pain behind and hopefully my anger will thrust me forward to where I want to be...free from the pain and ready to go on with my life.  Only one of many I have written on this subject.  This is a process I am going thru and it is my journey.    James

Broken
Member
since 2000-03-12
Posts 271
The woods
5 posted 2000-03-27 05:05 PM



Truth is you never even cared for me.
It's true...at one time my love was real...
but yours was not..so I must change the way I feel.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Your poem describes my life at the time. I`m in love with a girl who doesn`t seem to care about me at all, and it hurts as hell. That's why this poem made such a strong impression on me.


 I`m running out of time, I`m out of step and closing down, I never sleep for wanting hours the empty hours of greed. And uselessly always the need to feel again the real belief, of something more than mockery. If only I could fill my heart with love. -Robert Smith

Virgo
Junior Member
since 2000-03-27
Posts 46
tx
6 posted 2000-03-27 05:20 PM


http://216.87.210.95/pip/smiles/smile.gifIsn't it incredible how a few words on paper can help release all the pain???  Great poem...loved it.  It hit close to home>>>

 

Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
7 posted 2000-03-27 07:37 PM


James it is so frustrating the giving up.  Well written my friend  

 There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self...
~Isis~
(Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit)



Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

8 posted 2000-03-27 10:08 PM


sweetbabyjames...
strength in your words my friend....
deliver your self...
perfect declaration of emotions...
take care, stay strong...
jm

 Do you live by the book, do you play by the rules
Do you care what is thought by others about you
If this day is all that is promised to you
Do you live for the present, the future the past...
tracy chapman


kris
New Member
since 2000-03-27
Posts 3

9 posted 2000-03-27 11:07 PM


This was the very first poem I read as a new member here.  Thank-you for showing me that somebody else has experienced the pain of unrequited love.  Some doors stay closed no matter how much you bang your head on them . .
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
10 posted 2000-03-28 08:56 AM


Thank you broken for your comments...I agree that it hurts no matter what position you take..the journey is to find the right position...when I realized that I had to take my claws out of her and let go it was very painful...yet somehow I knew that I must.
Yes Virgo as you have said it does help release the pain...that is a fact.
Isis it is frustrating and painful to let go of something that to me represented love...but in truth was only my desire to be loved by the wrong person...only when I give up on this dream will I be free to pursue new opportunities.
Janet I love it when you call me sweet...I am giving it my best attempt to hold a position of strength...the scary part is if she showed up at my door tonight..I'm not sure if I could resist her..and I know that I must go on.
So true Kris and these are the doors that will become our biggest nightmares if we insist upon opening them.  The right one will open that door wide and welcome us with open arms.   As my friend Tina said.."Don't try so hard...just let it happen."  I appreciate the replys.   James

Veil_Gypsy
Junior Member
since 2000-03-27
Posts 44
Trapped in Veils of Starlight, and happy to be on my cosmic trail
11 posted 2000-03-28 01:41 PM


Wonderful way of describing the pain and hurt of that love that is often lost, but then again I have to say love is highly overrated   LOL!! But still bravo Dearie!!

Love Always
  
The Gypsy Bard


 She is like a cat in the dark and then she is your darkness....she rules her life like a bird in flight...Bard Gypsy

Sandra Cox
Junior Member
since 2000-03-24
Posts 48
Essex, London,UK
12 posted 2000-03-28 02:04 PM


Dear James

I know exactly what you felt in this poem.  I also exactly what you meant about, if she turned up on your doorstep you don't think you could resist her.  Its very hard to let go when we love someone that much, we know we must but we don't know how to.

Never again will you feel the pain
That surely will only drive you insane
Don't give her the pleasure to see
That to your heart she holds the key
Take it back and wait a while
For someone who will make you smile
Then you'll know she wasn't the one
And a new life without her has begun!

Best Wishes Sandra x

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
13 posted 2000-03-28 07:14 PM


Thanks Veil..I think love is the way I feel..love can be a full range of emotions..right now I feel love's pain.  
Did you ever listen to the BeeGees singing..How Can You Mend A Broken Heart?..."no one said a word about the sorrows".  Hey thats a cool black cat.
I know Sandra..I gave my heart and I have to take it back...I am on my way...I see so much beauty in other women.  Lovely thoughts you have written.   James

just_another_fe
Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 483
MICHIGAN
14 posted 2000-03-29 01:24 AM



James~
yayyyyyyyyyyyyy
im proud of you.Ive
been reading your stuff
(and loving it) and i am
soooooooo happy to see that
you are moving on (if only i
could do that lol) *hugz*
oh ya by the way good
poem lol it was very
powerful. i hope
she reads
it

~Angie
  

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
15 posted 2000-03-29 09:49 AM


James~ your words are so clear, show right to the hurt in your heart. I hope it heals soon.-SEA
Tess
Member
since 2000-03-22
Posts 288
Australia
16 posted 2000-03-29 09:54 AM


Anger...bittnerness..and yet still love there
Impossible to be together..
unbearable to be apart
so hard to let go....

A great poem..and one in which you could feel the raw emotion through every line

 "Love is the only drug you can take that will convince you each time
that you've never had it before."
~author unknown~



JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
17 posted 2000-03-29 05:56 PM


Angie, Sea, and Tess and all the others that have read this and responded... your words tell me that you understand the emotions I have been feeling.
It takes a soft and caring heart to feel someone else's pain.  Your words are like a gentle summer breeze warming my heart and soul.  Thank you all.    James


[This message has been edited by jmlee12345 (edited 03-29-2000).]

jenifeather
Junior Member
since 2000-02-21
Posts 31
Here
18 posted 2000-03-29 06:16 PM


great poem. lots of emotion. keep it up.

jennifer


 who's gonna pay attention, to your dreams
who's gonna plug their ears, when you scream
-the cars

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
19 posted 2000-03-30 04:16 PM


Thanks Jennifer I appreciate your nice comments.  Now I've pulled out my Cars CD...to listen to Drive..a song that always reminds me of woman I lost...but the song is so beautiful.  James
thebeautybrat
Member
since 2000-03-30
Posts 114
Florida
20 posted 2000-03-30 07:22 PM


Hey, I can totally relate to that! I thought it was great! I felt the emotion that you sent out as I read it and you could become something someday with this kind of poetry! People like you should post their poetry everywhere so not only I can be blessed with the gift of reading your poetry!
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
21 posted 2000-04-02 05:49 PM


Thank you beauty I appreciate you being concerned about the way I feel.  Lovely comments.   James
DziR
Junior Member
since 2000-03-29
Posts 11
Sydney, Australia
22 posted 2000-04-02 07:57 PM


I think that everyone has been in a similar postion to yours. You have just expressed the feelings of confliction so perfectly (confliction between your love for someone and your hurt from the same someone). I was so deeply moved by your poem. Such strong words, put together so perfectly!!! One thing I've learned by all these poems, is that there is the dark side of love, one that we never read about in the fairytales we were all bought up with. But for there to be goodness there has to be the dark side.  
You will find the strength (if you haven't already) to resist and be strong. Do what is best for you, and be true to yourself!
Hope to read more very soon!!

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
23 posted 2000-04-05 05:34 AM


Thank you for the nice comments..you are correct..once you assume a position in your mind..the power of the position will come to you and begin to give you strength.  You will become the person you want to be.  James
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