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kaile
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Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore

0 posted 2000-03-23 11:51 AM



An Empty Old Woman

Sits still,gazing out
This withered lone red rose stands
Hollow existence

© Copyright 2000 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved
Aiden Kelly
Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 148
Ft. Wayne, IN USA
1 posted 2000-03-23 03:24 PM


so true of those who've lost their will to live in their old age.  can't see the  beautiful rose that she still is.  well done!  i love what you do with haiku!  
Broken Wings
Member
since 2000-03-18
Posts 157
Miami, FL.
2 posted 2000-03-23 07:17 PM


THIS IS AWSOME! few words and yet filled with so much emotion. EXCELLENT!


take care,
Broken Wings  


 "As you learn and grow, you will realize the greater the pain, the greater the growth."
-IYANLA VANZANT



dhuron
Member
since 2000-03-19
Posts 476

3 posted 2000-03-23 09:46 PM


Haikus never made much sense to me. But your topic selection is great.  Comparing an old woman with a rose..perhaps the last rose on the bush..as all the rest have withered away....

good work

Jannel
Member
since 2000-01-18
Posts 492
Muncie, IN, USA
4 posted 2000-03-23 11:34 PM


i absolutely love these!

 Dont wake the dead,
Wake the dying,
Don't change what you've said,
Change what you're saying.

Tess
Member
since 2000-03-22
Posts 288
Australia
5 posted 2000-03-24 02:08 AM


This was great..you captured the image of someone who's life is gone from them..although they are still living...

Tess

 "What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two
bodies."
-Aristotle


kaile
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since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
6 posted 2000-03-25 01:06 AM


thank you all for responding and for your input....you have seen things that i have never thought about when i wrote this...like dhuron's image of a single rose on a bush....hmmmm...interesting ")

thank you guys once again....i love haiku and will strive to write more better ones ")

Sven
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Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
7 posted 2000-03-25 01:45 AM


I think that you're doing a fine job right now. . . you seem to have captured the spirit of haiku very well. . .

Excellent job. . .

--------------------------------------------------

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl


Mon Cherie
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Senior Member
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922
Land of Never-ending Summers
8 posted 2001-10-31 10:45 PM


I'm finally registered here.
And wow! this poem seems so... profound?
what exactly were your thoughts when u wrote this?

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