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Passions in Poetry

another dark haiku:)

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kaile
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Member Ascendant
since 02-06-2000
Posts 5323
singapore


0 posted 03-23-2000 11:51 AM       View Profile for kaile   Email kaile   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for kaile


An Empty Old Woman

Sits still,gazing out
This withered lone red rose stands
Hollow existence
© Copyright 2000 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved
Aiden Kelly
Member
since 02-14-2000
Posts 147
Ft. Wayne, IN USA


1 posted 03-23-2000 03:24 PM       View Profile for Aiden Kelly   Email Aiden Kelly   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Aiden Kelly

so true of those who've lost their will to live in their old age.  can't see the  beautiful rose that she still is.  well done!  i love what you do with haiku!  
Broken Wings
Member
since 03-18-2000
Posts 156
Miami, FL.


2 posted 03-23-2000 07:17 PM       View Profile for Broken Wings   Email Broken Wings   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Broken Wings

THIS IS AWSOME! few words and yet filled with so much emotion. EXCELLENT!


take care,
Broken Wings  


 "As you learn and grow, you will realize the greater the pain, the greater the growth."
-IYANLA VANZANT


dhuron
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since 03-19-2000
Posts 476


3 posted 03-23-2000 09:46 PM       View Profile for dhuron   Email dhuron   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit dhuron's Home Page   View IP for dhuron

Haikus never made much sense to me. But your topic selection is great.  Comparing an old woman with a rose..perhaps the last rose on the bush..as all the rest have withered away....

good work
Jannel
Member
since 01-18-2000
Posts 498
Muncie, IN, USA


4 posted 03-23-2000 11:34 PM       View Profile for Jannel   Email Jannel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Jannel

i absolutely love these!

 Dont wake the dead,
Wake the dying,
Don't change what you've said,
Change what you're saying.
Tess
Member
since 03-22-2000
Posts 291
Australia


5 posted 03-24-2000 02:08 AM       View Profile for Tess   Email Tess   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Tess's Home Page   View IP for Tess

This was great..you captured the image of someone who's life is gone from them..although they are still living...

Tess

 "What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two
bodies."
-Aristotle

kaile
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since 02-06-2000
Posts 5323
singapore


6 posted 03-25-2000 01:06 AM       View Profile for kaile   Email kaile   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for kaile

thank you all for responding and for your input....you have seen things that i have never thought about when i wrote this...like dhuron's image of a single rose on a bush....hmmmm...interesting ")

thank you guys once again....i love haiku and will strive to write more better ones ")
Sven
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since 11-23-1999
Posts 15611
Lansing, MI USA


7 posted 03-25-2000 01:45 AM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

I think that you're doing a fine job right now. . . you seem to have captured the spirit of haiku very well. . .

Excellent job. . .

--------------------------------------------------

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

Mon Cherie
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Senior Member
since 10-31-2001
Posts 999
Land of Never-ending Summers


8 posted 10-31-2001 10:45 PM       View Profile for Mon Cherie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mon Cherie

I'm finally registered here.
And wow! this poem seems so... profound?
what exactly were your thoughts when u wrote this?
 
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