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Dark Poetry #1
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Dark_kisses_Within
Senior Member
since 2000-03-21
Posts 680
Kansas

0 posted 2000-03-23 09:13 AM


Paint my face
Black and white
Cover my eyes
So I have no sight

Without my eyes
I see no sins
Cover them well
So he can not win

Tie me down
On to the bed
Make it tight
So the evil is dead

Without my arms
I can not feel
The heartless memory
Of Satan's deal

Take my heart
And hide it well
Secure the box
So Satan can not sell

Without my heart
I can not cry
About the painful day
When I die




 I do not love you for being perfect.....
I love you for being perfect for me!!

© Copyright 2000 Mags - All Rights Reserved
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

1 posted 2000-03-23 10:35 AM


Paint my face
Black and white
Cover my eyes
So I have no sight

Without my eyes
I see no sins
Cover them well
So he can not win

Tie me down
On to the bed
Make it tight
So the evil is dead
-------------

this is awesome...excellent rhyme flow...i love the images of trying to deny evil's influences...very well written.
take care, jm

 and you can say baby...
baby can I hold you tonight
maybe if told you the right words...
at the right time,
you'd be mine...
baby can I hold you tonight...
tracy chapman



dhuron
Member
since 2000-03-19
Posts 476

2 posted 2000-03-23 09:33 PM


GREAT!

So much struggle and strife within your poem.  Trying not to give in into temptation.

A remarkable Piece

Dhuron

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
3 posted 2000-03-23 11:59 PM


Excellent, but you cannot give in. . . cutting yourself off from the pain will not work. . .

You have really captured the futility of it all in this poem. . .

Welcome, my friend. . .

------------------------------------------------------

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl


Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
4 posted 2000-03-24 12:15 PM


Excellent piece, loved the theme, the pain etc.  But I don't believe as you do. I believe if you cannot cry or refuse to cry you are no longer a feeling person, just a shell and who wants to be cast upon life's beach always?  Not I!
Wonderful work  

 There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self...
~Isis~
(Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit)



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