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Dark Poetry #1
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Blood on a concrete slab........
| Dark Poetry #1 |
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Blood on a concrete slab........ |
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JOY 14 Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419Wisconsin USA |
The city is calm wrapped in the night With distilled air Curling smoke On the rooftop's stair flight I run up the steps 'Till I collapse in a heap Open to the world I stare down past the rail into it's depths Heart beat racing I step lightly to the ridge and over the rail, my feet bracing No moment stolen for thinking I plunge, I let go, Falling into the unknown Waking up on a concrete slab I see My blood, as dark as the sky All around me My feet are bleeding My hands, My face Trickling streams of blood I feel my fingers trace Warm liquid patterns on the cold surface where I lay Lost in a dream Nightmarish schemes My mind plays tricks on me While I lay Lost between fantasy and reality Wondering With what's left of my brain Will I ever wake up? And if I'm awake Do I die without anything, anyone But this hard, cold, concrete slab And swirls and curls Of smoke mixed with heavy blood Scented in the choking, early morning air....? |
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| © Copyright 2000 Kristen Joy Jacobus - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
My God Joy, this astounds me. And I don't know whether it is too graphic or not? I'll say no for now at least. Anything suicidal is always so tense and hard to judge you know? Even so, this was an amazing look at the feelings and emotions involved, well done!  There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self... ~Isis~ (Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit) |
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KimW Member
since 2000-03-04
Posts 268Medford, Oregon, USA |
Wow.. this left me in awe of the writing ability, etc. Incredibly strong and powerful! I was held by the emotion from beginning to end. Excellent! Kim |
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JOY 14 Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419Wisconsin USA |
Isis, I apologize if this is too graphic, but when I wrote it I couldn't think of anywhere I'd put it but here, in the Dark Forum. I am not suicidle right now, at least I haven't tried, just have thought and expressed most of my emotions in this poem. I'm just very stressed at the moment and have to vent and get feelings out through my poetry. So, again I am sorry if these words offend some people and if it is too graphic. Thanks for reading and your comments, Kim! Joy |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I gotta tell ya, i have a very hard time with these poems...i dont know how to respond...I know and understand COMPLETELY the need to work thru these feeling in our writing...but I just feel so sad, that ANYONE is so lost that they even for 1 moment consider this or find release in it...I wish for MORE for ALL of us...Im grateful your still here to post this... thanks for the kind words you replied to my poem of late...(smile) take care, please jm and you can say baby... baby can I hold you tonight maybe if told you the right words... at the right time, you'd be mine... baby can I hold you tonight... tracy chapman |
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JOY 14 Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419Wisconsin USA |
Janet Marie, Thank you. I know what you mean about not knowing what to say. I was just having a pretty bad moment and day, thank goodness now it has surpressed and I am in good spirits once again! Joy |
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