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JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA

0 posted 2000-01-15 04:40 PM


Begining note

This is a poem that evolved into death I gues, rather than life, but also a life that turned to death? (I'm not sure)  Anyway, enjoy!  

Alas brittle corpse
Dead, exerted, finally free
Gone, hung,
Imortal judgement killed
Lost life mourning nothing
Obliterating perpetual quests
Repelling
Silent torment
Useless vacant whispers
eXisisted,
Yearning years
Zilch!

  End Note

This was a hard one to do!  Thinking of "Z" was the hardest, especialy trying to wrap up my semi-serious poem without making it sound silly.



 JOY


© Copyright 2000 Kristen Joy Jacobus - All Rights Reserved
Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
1 posted 2000-01-15 05:29 PM


You did fine Joy, maybe I did mine in the wrong way??  Anyway, it was fine   < !signature-->

 Let your heart guide you. It whispers, so listen closely.
~Isis~
(Sovereign of the Spirit)




[This message has been edited by Isis (edited 01-15-2000).]

JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA
2 posted 2000-01-15 06:17 PM


No, Isis.  Yours was great!  I doubt anyone could do it wrong when being creative about it!!

 JOY


merely_a_jester
Member
since 2000-01-14
Posts 67
Arkansas... that's all you get
3 posted 2000-01-15 11:58 PM


i like it
the phrasing and unique words make the feeling all the more meaningful, in my opinion, even if you weren't alphabatizing  

merely_a_jester

JennyLee
Senior Member
since 1999-09-01
Posts 1461
Northwestern, NJ.
4 posted 2000-01-16 09:18 AM


You did a great job Joy  
I enjoyed the read!


Jenny


 Words bloom like flowers that seem astonished at being born.

L. Pirandello
16th Century Dramatist


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