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Dark Poetry #1
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lostboy
Member
since 1999-11-21
Posts 275
New Hampshire, USA

0 posted 1999-11-23 09:40 AM


What can I say
What can I do
I've got a secret, it's about you
Trying hard, I just can't understand

On the edge, I feel forsaken
Dreaming of a love that's taken
It won't stop
It won't let me go

I see your face
And there I go
My heart racing with my mind in tow
It wasn't like something I had planned

Hold on, I can win this
Taking aim hoping I don't miss
I have to hold on

© Copyright 1999 lostboy - All Rights Reserved
starboards
Member
since 1999-10-14
Posts 467
longwood, florida
1 posted 1999-11-23 10:24 AM


Lostboy- I like this poem because it can mean different things to the viewer...LIKIN' IT, LOVIN' IT!!! good job!

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"If you love something let it go...if it comes back to you it is yours...if it doesnt then it never was"

Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
2 posted 1999-11-23 05:38 PM


I agree it's intriguing in a way, good job

------------------
The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there IS to celebrate.
~Isis~
(Daughter of Mystery)



JennyLee
Senior Member
since 1999-09-01
Posts 1461
Northwestern, NJ.
3 posted 1999-11-24 08:45 AM


I really enjoyed this verse lostboy as....dreaming of love that's been taken describes many emotions wrapped into one small phrase....great work!


Jenny Lee

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Love is an attempt at penetrating another being,But it can only succeed if the surrender is mutual.



Pepper
Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079
Southern Florida
4 posted 1999-11-24 09:38 AM


I've been there too lostboy....really appreciate this piece.......!

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A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire!


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