»
Archives
»
Dark Poetry #1
»
Alone
| Dark Poetry #1 |
|
Alone |
|
|
Dipali New Member
since 1999-09-08
Posts 5Denver,CO,USA |
Sometimes when we are alone I wonder about this world you and I, My mind is full of questions For answers then I look in your eye. You see my tear-stained face but turn away and look into the sea, You tell me stories of your life playing with the sand and ignoring me. I don't want to be alone in this world My heart aches for love and laughter, You are my only hope and inspiration I am tired and want to sleep in your shelter. Sometimes I sit and wonder about my life you and I, For an answer then I look at HIM He doesn't answer me but a tear falls from his eye. [This message has been edited by Dipali (edited 11-09-1999).] [This message has been edited by Dipali (edited 11-09-1999).] |
||
| © Copyright 1999 Dipali - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Deep Blue Me Member
since 1999-11-04
Posts 396By a big lake |
Interesting, D Who is HIM? Good structure. Want to read more. DB ------------------ September 30, 1659. I, poor, miserable Robinson Crusoe, being shipwrecked, during a dreadful storm in the offing, came ashore on this dismal unfortunate island, which I called "the Island of Despair," all the rest of the ship's company being drowned, and myself almost dead. ----Robinson Crusoe---- ==Daniel DeFoe== |
||
|
JennyLee Senior Member
since 1999-09-01
Posts 1461Northwestern, NJ. |
Dipali...I liked this very much;it flows well! Jenny Lee  ------------------ Love is an attempt at penetrating another being,But it can only succeed if the surrender is mutual. |
||
|
Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Great poem, Dipali. The last stanza I found especially intriguing. Maybe you have been answered and just haven't realized it yet. Michael |
||
|
Dipali New Member
since 1999-09-08
Posts 5Denver,CO,USA |
Hi DB, Appreciate that you took time to read it. By HIM I mean God. I look at God for an answer(meaning I look at the sky)but instead a tear drops from his eye(meaning it starts to rain) as he knows that i am destined to be alone like this forever. |
||
|
Dipali New Member
since 1999-09-08
Posts 5Denver,CO,USA |
Thank you all for reading it !! ------------------ [This message has been edited by Dipali (edited 11-09-1999).] |
||
|
Lynn Member
since 1999-09-20
Posts 316Jasper, Alabama U.S.A. |
Dipali....I liked this a lot. |
||
|
Watcher666 Senior Member
since 1999-10-13
Posts 1606 |
Well done! ------------------ Illusion...what we see and what we do...it's all up to you. |
||
|
mojar Member
since 1999-11-09
Posts 169granbury, texas, usa |
this strikes home. follows my life like an open book. very good. |
||
|
Deep Blue Me Member
since 1999-11-04
Posts 396By a big lake |
Got it, D. Keep writing. DB ------------------ Tongue-tied and twisted Just an Earthbound misfit... P. Floyd |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||