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Dark Poetry #1
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Bitter Thoughts
| Dark Poetry #1 |
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Bitter Thoughts |
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Systematic Decay Senior Member
since 1999-09-15
Posts 1301That place with padded walls and funny people in white......... |
I believe the telephone is ringing Demanding of me, shrilly singing I lift receiver to my ear And who do you suppose I hear? My master, of whom I long ago disposed Far away, I hear her weeping It matters not to me, for I was sleeping So much from me she's already taken And for her insolence I'm awakened The nerve she has, disturbing my repose I repeat these bitter thoughts to her And rub from my eyes morning blur Although it's late in afternoon Even though, I wish to again rest soon Yet still her raging voice remains She is seemingly now imploring that my words should send her soaring Her apology has me not shaken I tell her she was mistaken To treat me with such disdain She is now silenced with suprise She's used to my placating lies But I'll no longer digress My feelings no longer supressed I simply say, "**** off." With this remark I'm sure she's floored No more delusions that she's adored And before I return to my world of dreams Where hopeless hopes eternally gleam I repeat to her, "**** off." ------------------ "Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage." -Billy Corgan- [This message has been edited by Systematic Decay (edited 10-14-1999).] |
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| © Copyright 1999 Systematic Decay - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Watcher666 Senior Member
since 1999-10-13
Posts 1606 |
Excellent verse.I liked this much!! ------------------ Illusion...what we see and what we do...it's all up to you. |
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JennyLee Senior Member
since 1999-09-01
Posts 1461Northwestern, NJ. |
Great verse here Dear SYS! Enjoyed very much as always!! Jenny  |
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Systematic Decay Senior Member
since 1999-09-15
Posts 1301That place with padded walls and funny people in white......... |
Thanks...Personally I think the phrasing and meter needs some work...but thanks ------------------ "Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage." -Billy Corgan- |
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suicidal dreams Member
since 1999-09-28
Posts 343Toledo Ohio USA |
Amy it dont need work its great . BTW is this poem about the Woman im so eager of disposeing of.------------------ life is short kill quick |
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Systematic Decay Senior Member
since 1999-09-15
Posts 1301That place with padded walls and funny people in white......... |
Woman? Is that the correct term for her? ------------------ "Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage." -Billy Corgan- |
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suicidal dreams Member
since 1999-09-28
Posts 343Toledo Ohio USA |
Fine is it about that wretched hag i so long to dispose of?  ------------------ life is short kill quick |
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Midniteyez Junior Member
since 1999-10-15
Posts 20Soldotna, Alaska USA |
I like this very much. I am encouraged to come back and read more and more and more. You are a truly gifted person. |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Good job, Sys. A definate change of pace here but you conformed well. The meter and rhyme as you say can be touched up but all in all the poem flows really well...really enjoyed this one. ------------------ Michael Anderson Is all that we see or seem but a dream within a dream? |
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
Being not a poet, I know little of rhyme nor meter, I just know what I like, and this I like! ------------------ May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams |
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