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Buzzygirl
Junior Member
since 1999-09-11
Posts 42
St. Paul, MN USA

0 posted 1999-09-12 05:24 PM


This is an old one...

AT ENMITY

(can this empty room
be full of noise?)

The paper is now
as blank as my stare, and
listening, I have become aware…

I don’t know where we now stand, but
there is ink all over my hands, for
I have here a note that fairly
bleeds with emotion...

... But....

..If the solution to you
came sliding up alongside me
and whispered its secrets to me,
I still wouldn’t know you--

If, in all your scope, you were but
a mere batting of an eye,
a tiny flutter of a lash,
a small tic of the cheek,
I wonder then, why
does the hurt still shadow my step;
why is your memory still making me
weak?

Why are you still...

... a thought that darts across my mind,
jolting me from the subconscious of
sleep?

Out of many, you not among them,
I let these go quite easily- yet
For you, the lines were distinctly blurred-
I wonder now of their integrity;
Where do I now place
my boundaries?

There were not lines demarked
in the sand,
but you overstepped something
even I don’t understand;
And we both know
why I let you go, but
when I did, something snapped
audibly; this wasn’t as easy
as I thought it should be

So many, I know, have suffered worse
than this; but
there was something in your kiss
that told me you’d not harm me,
yet we got no further
than this-

Do high standards make
for many lonely hours; must my
principles substitute
for the solace of your
warmth?

I cannot have the both at once,
I remind myself over and over of
all the reasons you weren’t good for me-
I don’t cry even as I dwell on them,
there just remains
an aching, like a strange hangover
that plants itself on the back of my brain
and asserts itself by gnawing there
until I am aware of pain;
it moors itself there insistently
until sleep finally comes again

The night and I are at
enmity
until dreams free of you
finally settle upon me
--
10/96

© Copyright 1999 Buzzygirl - All Rights Reserved
JennyLee
Senior Member
since 1999-09-01
Posts 1461
Northwestern, NJ.
1 posted 1999-09-17 03:53 PM


I REALLY LIKE THIS!!

------------------
Helewes

Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
2 posted 1999-09-17 06:52 PM


A wonderful work, buzzygirl,
This one slithers right across the soul.

michael

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