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Open Poetry #32
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muted
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since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving

0 posted 2004-06-11 04:35 PM





© Copyright 2004 Dawn van Krieken-Smith - All Rights Reserved
Janet Marie
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since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

1 posted 2004-06-11 04:39 PM


haunting....
love the vocab in this Dawn...
cool presentation as well.

When your own emptiness is all thats getting through
There comes a point when youre not sure why youre still talking
I passed that point long ago

Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2004-06-11 04:41 PM


Amazing once again Dawn....
Going back for another read of this keeper.
Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
Dancing with you in the summer rain~

vandana
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USA
3 posted 2004-06-11 04:59 PM


nice
iliana
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since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
4 posted 2004-06-11 06:10 PM


This was so overwhelming.  You know who this made me think of, no doubt.  Excellent, muted, excellent.  
Nightshade
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just out of reach
5 posted 2004-06-11 06:14 PM



Excellent!!
hugs, Chris

   Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale.
                                          Hans Christian Anderson

Dark Angel
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since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

6 posted 2004-06-11 06:25 PM


Overwhelming indeed, this aches m'friend, but as always...so wonderfully written and wonderfully presented.



Maree.

The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change.
~Stevie Nicks~

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
7 posted 2004-06-11 10:02 PM


smile for the camera...
Kevo
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since 2004-06-02
Posts 466
Navarro County, Texas, USA
8 posted 2004-06-11 10:08 PM


I really enjoyed this poem.  It was eloquently written with close attention to wasted words.  How do I know this?  Simply because there were no wasted words...every one of them appointed in perfection.

Kevin

Susan
Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
9 posted 2004-06-11 11:13 PM


par excellence -- sometimes I wonder what sparks an inspiration such as this, the use of a marionnette?  I must try stretching a bit more.  This inspires me to think outside my ususal box.

Susan

The whole of the Universe resides within each individual heart.

MovesInSilence
Member
since 2004-03-21
Posts 111
Perth, Australia
10 posted 2004-06-11 11:21 PM


Awsome piece there buddy
somehow i don't think i will look at puppets the same ever again ....

It's not the blindfold that blinds you,
it's the person that puts it there.

Sadelite
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since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519

11 posted 2004-06-12 12:08 PM


this is very creatively written with much power;  thought provoking...
               Sadelite

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
12 posted 2004-06-12 12:56 PM


I would hope a well placed swipe with a keen edge would leave this marionette standing free.


nakdthoughts
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since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
13 posted 2004-06-12 04:20 PM


I like Ed's response, Dawn...

wonderful writing, as aways

M

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
14 posted 2004-06-12 05:38 PM


ACK!!!

Get out of my mirror!  LOL...

very good, Dawn...
very good!

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
15 posted 2004-06-12 06:52 PM


Wonderful write...
Wonderful!!
TD

Copperbell
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since 2003-11-08
Posts 956

16 posted 2004-06-12 10:57 PM


This makes you think - how many people are gaped at while being pulled on by our culture's invisible strings?
passing shadows
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since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
17 posted 2004-06-17 12:59 PM


wow
LeeJ
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since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

18 posted 2004-06-17 01:30 PM


lovely, so sad and bittersweet
amazingly brilliant, written very well
Thank you for sharing...

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

19 posted 2004-06-18 02:21 PM


gawd Dawn, this is soooo beautiful.  Very well done...
Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
20 posted 2004-06-19 10:38 PM


Wow and damn....this aches so beautifully.  Love the presentation.

Melissa~

Intellectually I know that Canada is no better than any other country. Emotionally I KNOW that Canada is the best country in the world!

Earth Angel
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since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
21 posted 2004-06-19 11:10 PM


'Twould be a shame if you were ever truly "muted"! You speak so well thru' your poetry!

A very fine write, Dear Dawn!!!

Love & Light,
Linda

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