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Open Poetry #32
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inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio

0 posted 2004-05-20 10:37 PM



Maybe i revealed too much;
(afterall)

i have a weakness for that;

breaking down
at the revelation of
a shared moment,

too few of them
these days;

you know those moments
when everything stops,
and two souls connect,

i showed you my desire;

maybe you couldn't
handle the fire;

i can no more contain myself
than the trees, upon the
teasing winds that exhilerate
their pretty skirts in a
dance of seduction,

it's all specuation now;

did i leave myself open
when i gushed
over your baby blues
and told you
' the sea and sky
have taken residence
in your eyes'

i can't give my body
with out the rest to follow,

i'm realizing that more with time;

i need to be heard
and acknowledged;

even with a 'casual' affair,
how does one truly make love
and not want to be touched afterwards?

you're young,
so i'll have to look away a bit,

i won't cook you in poetic soup,
along with the power broker
that blazed in before you,

your head won't roll like a cabbage,
becoming the main course
as the stew is boiling over
with your last remains,

i'm just caught in another crossfire;

as you bounced off too soon
from the heels of the last disaster,

if you were born of my generation
i'd have your head right now,
you'd be digging my fangs out
from the blatancy of your disrespect,

but for now
i just simply find you
too beautiful.

© Copyright 2004 inkedgoddess - All Rights Reserved
Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
1 posted 2004-05-20 10:43 PM


So many people get shallower with time....it's good to know one who doesn't.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Susan
Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
2 posted 2004-05-20 11:11 PM


I really liked the flow of this and the emotions etched into the words.  Excellent.

Smiles -- Susan

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
3 posted 2004-05-21 12:41 PM


Relationships are like playing catch...as long as the ball keeps coming back they want to play...James
muted
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving
4 posted 2004-05-21 12:54 PM


oh goodness, this really hurts...so many things youve said here i want to highlight, but..honestly, the whole poem would end up in this reply box.
just know, youve made some awesome points

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2004-05-21 02:41 AM


dang...this is awesome!
Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
6 posted 2004-05-21 04:02 PM


I seriously don't know whether to nod with agreement or laugh at the commonalities!  

One thing for sure, you wrote it very well!

"cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind"
~Sarah McLachlan~

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
7 posted 2004-05-21 04:16 PM


thanks for stopping by
JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
8 posted 2004-05-21 04:31 PM


"if you were born of my generation
i'd have your head right now,
you'd be digging my fangs out
from the blatancy of your disrespect,

but for now
i just simply find you
too beautiful. "

Wow!  What a tribute to that lucky person!

JL

She said: ”You look cute in the dark.”


Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
9 posted 2004-05-21 04:50 PM


Excellent excellent write Michele!!
You left much to think about here...very much enjoyed.
Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
Dancing with you in the summer rain~

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
10 posted 2004-05-21 07:10 PM


quote:
i can no more contain myself
than the trees, upon the
teasing winds that exhilerate
their pretty skirts in a
dance of seduction,



Wow, Michelle, your words dance off the page so charmingly!

A stunning piece.
Love, Margherita

ESP
Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556
Floating gently on a cloud....
11 posted 2004-05-21 07:22 PM


Wow...definitely a library box tick!
~Liz.

"Time has told me not to ask for more, one day our ocean will find its shore" ~Nick Drake

bklynboy
Senior Member
since 2002-12-15
Posts 660
florida
12 posted 2004-05-21 11:46 PM


Yada Yada Yada.....fool me once, shame on you .....fool me twice....shame on me.....
Shame shame....everyone knows your name!

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
13 posted 2004-05-21 11:50 PM


thanks again for stopping in
my bboy

Kaoru
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow
14 posted 2004-05-22 01:26 AM


ooh ohh... *faints*
Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
15 posted 2004-05-22 01:30 AM


you write the real
bones, revealed

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
16 posted 2004-05-22 01:45 AM


i can't give my body
with out the rest to follow,

i'm realizing that more with time;

i need to be heard
and acknowledged;

even with a 'casual' affair,
how does one truly make love
and not want to be touched afterwards?



Yep, me too, Michelle.


Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

17 posted 2004-05-22 02:25 AM


Maybe i revealed too much;
(afterall)

i have a weakness for that;

breaking down
at the revelation of
a shared moment,

too few of them
these days;

you know those moments
when everything stops,
and two souls connect,

i showed you my desire;

maybe you couldn't
handle the fire;

i can no more contain myself
than the trees, upon the
teasing winds that exhilerate
their pretty skirts in a
dance of seduction,



Wow...not only have you made some awesome points, you've written me! to a T.

This is "too beautiful"

it's a keeper.

Maree  


The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change.
~Stevie Nicks~

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
18 posted 2004-05-23 02:05 AM


Inked one -- you are always so true to yourself -- there were so many good lines in this poem, I can't single just a few out.  The thing I liked most about the poem was that you kind of fooled me -- the tone changed half way through -- but the level of honesty did not -- and I really liked the ending.   .....jo
inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
19 posted 2004-05-23 08:02 AM


thanks for stopping by; always a pleasure to know you were here
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