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Open Poetry #32
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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2004-05-06 12:00 PM


She ached promises to God
pledging industry she begged
("johnny and the appleseeds")
whimpered soliticiously
against a hawking of her head
beneath the pillowing relief
some will fall
the beckoning!
a finger
crook'd
before the teeth
forgot about themselves
and smiled
revealing
moldy brick
she said:
"no, you did not witness this"

the ground
too hard
to dig
for grave...

"tell them all that I died saved..."


She hawked pillows with her head

aching

promises to God.

© Copyright 2004 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
1 posted 2004-05-06 12:09 PM


Howdy Karenity m'witch.

An ache as prayer...or prayer in aching...

Either way, I like!

Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

2 posted 2004-05-06 12:18 PM


"She ached promises to God
pledging industry she begged
("johnny and the appleseeds")
whimpered soliticiously
against a hawking of her head
beneath the pillowing relief
some will fall
the beckoning!
a finger
crook'd
before the teeth
forgot about themselves
and smiled
revealing
moldy brick
she said:
"no, you did not witness this"

the ground
too hard
to dig
for grave...

"tell them all that I died saved..."


She hawked pillows with her head

aching

promises to God."

Yes...I quoted the entire poem.  
I was just wondering if anyone has told you lately that you're brilliant?


passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
3 posted 2004-05-06 02:47 AM


me likes!
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
4 posted 2004-05-06 04:45 AM


very very nice...

Regards
sudhir

Goldenrose
Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665

5 posted 2004-05-06 04:52 AM


Fine writing....thank you...

Goldenrose.

''There is no need for temples, no need for complicated Philosophies.
My brain and my heart are my temples; my philosophy is kindness''-  Dalai Lama

Lost Awhile
Junior Member
since 2004-05-06
Posts 17
UK
6 posted 2004-05-06 05:11 AM


Very nice. I only wish I could experience some of the same....He seems to have passed me by.
Kaoru
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow
7 posted 2004-05-06 06:32 AM


Ooo ooOO witcheh woOman..
Just popped into my head.

I do LOVE your writings!

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

8 posted 2004-05-06 06:42 AM


Oh and so do I Gorgeous. So do I.

me thinks I shall keep this one.

Mxx

What are you my god? You touch me like you are my god
What are you my twin? You affect me like you are my twin.

Go Alanis!


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

9 posted 2004-05-06 08:27 AM


"tell them all that I died saved..."
======================================

saved BY someone?
or FROM ourselves????

yeah I know baby...why ask why...
yayaya

The ink bleeds through cuz you're paper thin
you're one more fool with a paper and pen
lookin for a poem in the water stains on the floor.

R.B.

scorpio
Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178
right...there
10 posted 2004-05-06 08:31 AM


Powerfully written.  Well done.

believe in what your heart feels...

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
11 posted 2004-05-06 08:50 AM


the ground
too hard
to dig
for grave...

"tell them all that I died saved..."


She hawked pillows with her head

aching

promises to God.

~*~

Start teaching, poet...

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
12 posted 2004-05-06 09:19 AM


Time for the book Ser...
for sure!
I love this..
Hugs lady~

~ Lost in you, I found myself. ~

jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

13 posted 2004-05-06 10:07 AM


ah...promises to God...I have found the situation is usually beyond tolerance when the promises start flowing....
will send hugs and prayers that you will find softness in your pillow and answers to your prayers

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
14 posted 2004-05-06 10:18 AM


serenity...You're an amzazing lady, ya know?  
iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
15 posted 2004-05-06 11:59 AM


Phenominal!
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

16 posted 2004-05-07 12:33 PM


Thank you all so much for reading, and for taking the time to let me know that you did.

It means much to me.


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