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Open Poetry #32
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Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia

0 posted 2004-04-23 11:01 PM


that shadow gonna
follow
gonna follow now
it am
to that rest

to that rest
i am
gonna urn

it don't deserve it
to come there
to follow me

but it gonna come too
cause there
I shall go
one day

I am there to be
and we all shall
too

and the places of that
shadow
where it fell to earth

the places where it
darkened on the grass
and concrete

those places gonna be
bright
with sun

but that shadow
gonna still be
dark with me

it am a short time
that my shadow
am to walk

it am a short time
for all the shadows

while we am here
in our laconic interval
it am a damn shame
that the best

the very best

the only best thing
there am
am to be in the shadow
of a friend
but we wander round
in the hot sun
to till and labor
for bread

to till and labor
for bread again
and bread don't
love us

yes sir it am
a damn shame
that we spend our
sweat

drippin wet on
that damn shadow
we make ourselves to be

when what makes us best
just lay out there
to grow however
it may or will

in the weeds

© Copyright 2004 Local Rebel - All Rights Reserved
Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
1 posted 2004-04-23 11:18 PM


drippin wet on
that damn shadow
we make ourselves to be

when what makes us best
just lay out there
to grow however
it may or will

in the weeds

Great close, always admire your words

wordwizard
Member
since 2003-09-08
Posts 483
on the way to next world
2 posted 2004-04-23 11:38 PM


Does man exist or just thinks he does....
an interesting write and style..


mytuesdaywishes
Member
since 2003-09-05
Posts 254
a voice from the musicbox
3 posted 2004-04-24 12:41 PM


incredibly unique and innovative style, i love it...you do it so well, too. thanks for the great words.

joy has its own justice. and dreams are languid and lawless. and everything bows to beauty, when it's fierce and when it's flawless...

Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

4 posted 2004-04-24 01:06 AM


"it don't deserve it
to come there
to follow me

but it gonna come too
cause there
I shall go
one day"

. . . the fate of it all

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
5 posted 2004-04-24 08:26 AM


Sounds of an old spiritual...
deep from the heart.

As always, you have my admiration,
saying

IWIHWT...

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
6 posted 2004-04-24 08:40 AM


touching words, LR

in an accent that brings it home...

"cause there
I shall go
one day"

M

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
7 posted 2004-04-24 03:12 PM


and the places of that
shadow
where it fell to earth

the places where it
darkened on the grass
and concrete

those places gonna be
bright
with sun

but that shadow
gonna still be
dark with me

it am a short time
that my shadow
am to walk

it am a short time
for all the shadows


Nobody preaches it quite like you do, my friend.
Very, very good writing, Reb, that stays in the mind
and the heart of the reader......
Hugs,  
Ethel


passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
8 posted 2004-04-24 03:14 PM


profound...yes
inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
9 posted 2004-04-24 04:04 PM


i am the growing weed
but who wants me?

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
10 posted 2004-04-24 04:30 PM


Dems weeds spreads shadows all over da place!
Kill dems weeds! Kill dems all!

~ and let there be Light!


EA

Juju
Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
11 posted 2004-04-24 09:44 PM


The difference between a weed and a flower is relative. what is wanted and what is not. It is hard to be rejected and then lost in the world of rejection. Then Hiding, because of the fear of rejection. Sigh... right now I am climbing my way out. yep. One day I will be Juju the flower. Almost there.(Smiles)
Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia
12 posted 2004-04-25 06:13 PM


ok karilea -- I give.. what's the acronym??

thanks very much to all -- it am not the best damn pome I ever writ... but it's the best one I writ this week..

Michelle -- I don't (do not) believe that at all... you're a wild flower.

muted
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving
13 posted 2004-04-29 11:37 AM


maybe its not a weed amongst the roses...maybe the rose is a weed amongst the dandelions....perception

sometimes the shadow is cool shade...
when we need hiding from the sun

really enjoyed this write

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
14 posted 2004-04-29 11:50 AM


LR

Ya know...this just got to me...the style and unique you, and the meaning behind it all.  Wonderful!  

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
15 posted 2004-04-29 12:58 PM


I Wish I Had Written This...
garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
16 posted 2004-04-29 01:22 PM


What did you think it meant, Reb?  LOL

the "IWIHWT".......

I had to come back to copy this so that I can study it.
Why? Because IWIHWT, too!!
Hugs,
Ethel

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

17 posted 2004-04-29 03:47 PM


reminds me of a few sermons I have heard..from old men who as dark as the shadow you speak of, rose to speak their hearts....

well done sir... as usual

jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

18 posted 2004-04-30 03:06 PM


ok.......................................................................................................
I don't get it....I mean I read the words and can understand the poem on the surface, but I don't understand what lies deeper???
what you aren't really saying but yet are...
*drums fingers and waits for an explanation*

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
19 posted 2004-05-01 10:01 PM


those places gonna be
bright
with sun

but that shadow
gonna still be
dark with me

Kinda hard to shake it some days,
but dayumm if the sun doesn't warm my soul.

Nice writing, Reb~

MGROVES
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802
california
20 posted 2004-05-02 04:37 AM


i feel what you are saying, i see whats in the shadows, i try not to believe, my heart breaks, as i know what i need to do, the timeing, the fears, the acceptance  nice write,thanks


majnu
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088
SF Bay Area
21 posted 2004-05-19 01:29 PM


i must give it more thought, but wanted to let you know that i read and enjoyed it.

-majnu
--------------------------------------
Timid thoughts be not afraid. I am a Poet.

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