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Open Poetry #32
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muted
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Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving

0 posted 2004-04-19 02:14 PM


**incubus is used as a synonym for "nightmare" rather than "demon" in the context of this poem**


© Copyright 2004 Dawn van Krieken-Smith - All Rights Reserved
Seymour Tabin
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Tamarac Fla
1 posted 2004-04-19 02:19 PM


muted,
It sings, enjoyed.

Enchantress
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Canada eh.
2 posted 2004-04-19 05:18 PM


Excellent Dawn!!  Very much enjoyed!
Hugs~

To have lived the dream of a love so true...
   is to have seen a glimpse of heaven.

JL
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Texas, USA
3 posted 2004-04-19 05:21 PM


Very intriguing read.  Very nice.
JL


Dark Angel
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4 posted 2004-04-19 06:31 PM


"and the moon pours it's soured milk"

absolutely love that line.

Well Done Dawn

Beauty of the world which is soon to perish has two edges, one of laughter and one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder.
(by Virginia Woolf)

Grover
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London, ON, Canada
5 posted 2004-04-19 07:54 PM


Really enjoyed!
Krawdad
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6 posted 2004-04-19 08:14 PM


From a real dream?
Well, anything is possible in a nightmare.
I wonder tho, about the change in person, from I to she. ???

Sadelite
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7 posted 2004-04-19 08:57 PM


Muted,
   Parts of this say Dali to me.  Especially liked the spilt milk in the moonlight over wooden floor image.  You have so many facets to your writing, Dawn.
                Sadie

muted
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8 posted 2004-04-20 01:53 AM


Krawdad: when I mention "she" i am refering to pandora...pandora slept...like im watching the dream and the scary part of it is actually sleeping...so im left less affected..
you know how wierd dreams can be...but its not an actual dream Ive had, this is just pure make believe

thanks everybody for your comments

MovesInSilence
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9 posted 2004-04-20 02:06 AM


Wake up dawn ... oops you are
verry well written and picture perfectly placed. This reminds me of the nightmares i just to have as a little ... ummm i just hope they don't follow me to bed tonight.

once again well written Dawn

muted
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10 posted 2004-04-20 02:11 AM


...Lina..Lina...time for nigh nighs...
passing shadows
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displaced
11 posted 2004-04-20 03:38 AM


neat...kinda dark...but cool
DragonFang
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12 posted 2004-04-20 06:44 AM


I very much enjoyed reading it. Quite beautiful.
Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
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In Your Poetic Mind
13 posted 2004-04-20 08:58 AM


simply stunning Dawn~ one of your best.....

~~**~~
The sound of silence calls,
I hear your voice and suddenly
I'm falling, lost in a dream
The echo of our souls meet
~~**~~

iliana
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USA
14 posted 2004-06-05 11:56 PM


A brilliant write, Dawn, but I do sense tremendous pain of lucidity along with this.  
Aenimal
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the ass-end of space
15 posted 2004-06-06 06:24 PM


very nice, always like the images you accompany your words with
Earth Angel
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Realms of Light
16 posted 2004-06-06 06:39 PM


This poem merits a "Double WOW" ~ So here it is: WOW!!! WOW!!!

It captures the imagination!

Wondrously descriptive and ethereal!

Sweet dreams!
EA

steavenr
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17 posted 2004-06-06 09:25 PM


I was intrigued by the title...captivated by the content...and awed by its effect...very nicely done
muted
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Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving
18 posted 2004-06-06 11:07 PM


Jo~ i see you dug this old thing up! LOL
im glad you enjoyed enough to comment..thank you

Aenimal~ thank you very nice to see you visit this

Earth Angel~ a double wow?? WOW thank you

steavenr~oh my! thank you so much...."captivated" , thats a very nice compliment

Sunshine
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Listening to every heart
19 posted 2004-06-07 09:07 AM


Ah little girl...
you capped the moon
and tipped the tides
with this one...

wranx
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since 2002-06-07
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Moved from a shack to a barn
20 posted 2004-06-07 01:55 PM


Always liked the spill of moon on the floor, myself. But this conjures a different meaning.

Many liquids pour from this...

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