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Open Poetry #32
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Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095


0 posted 2004-04-19 02:46 AM


Sleeping with my eyes open


The street is wet
and it reflects

light of ghost from thin red post
I take a step, heel to toe
to walk a path of the damned


with a bourbon in my hand

all alone outside myself
the rivers hiss and bagpipes drone
and in climb of “get over it”
I stomp my foot  
in silent greet


sleeping with my eyes open

there you stand dressed in black
a shadow dancing silence wrapped
and as you flick your eyes at me


I yield the ground beneath my feet



Beauty of the world which is soon to perish has two edges, one of laughter and one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder.
(by Virginia Woolf)

[This message has been edited by Dark Angel (04-21-2004 12:14 AM).]

© Copyright 2004 Dark Angel - All Rights Reserved
muted
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Member Elite
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving
1 posted 2004-04-19 03:49 AM


OMG, this is an awesome poem..
the words seem to relate a sadness, but indiferrence speaks louder....youve delicately played the reader here. very good!

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
2 posted 2004-04-19 03:55 AM


some nights can do that to ya   I know of a few myself
garysgirl
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Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
3 posted 2004-04-19 10:58 AM


ooooohhhhh, sounds scary, Maree. LOL
Made me think of the ghost stories
that my Grandmother used to tell us as kids.
I loved them. LOL
Hugs,
Ethel

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
4 posted 2004-04-19 11:03 AM


Powerfully expressed nightly visions!
Love, Margherita

Martie
Moderator
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
5 posted 2004-04-19 11:03 AM


Maree

You create quite a mood....dark and cold and something to brave for tears.  

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

6 posted 2004-04-19 11:09 AM


all alone outside myself
the rivers hiss and bagpipes bleep
and in climb of “get over it”
I stomp my foot  
in silent greet


No matter how old we are, sometimes it is difficult to not want what we don't have and act out....very good write

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

7 posted 2004-04-19 06:43 PM


Hi Everyone, thanks for your lovely comments and replies.. I appreciate them so much...

this was just another dream, not sure if they're going forward or backward. I suppose I'll find out soonish enough.

Thanks again

Beauty of the world which is soon to perish has two edges, one of laughter and one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder.
(by Virginia Woolf)

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
8 posted 2004-04-19 08:51 PM


Never bite the hand of the muse that feeds you...
it was said before, I'll ditto...
this IS an awesome poem!

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
9 posted 2004-04-19 09:09 PM


Oh my, what a haunting vision this is Maree.
Like a magic carpet ride, made me dizzy!

There is nothing better than a poem that takes me there.


Thank you, thank you!


Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
10 posted 2004-04-19 09:14 PM


Awesome...awesome write.
Hugs sweet lady~

To have lived the dream of a love so true...
   is to have seen a glimpse of heaven.

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
11 posted 2004-04-19 09:27 PM


Naw, the bourbon in your hand couldn't have had anything to do with losing the ground beneath your feet, so I won't even go there...

This I think is the best of your's I've read yet, my friend, and I try to read them all because each is so well done.

Lifting my "bourbon" . . . to you...


jwesley

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

12 posted 2004-04-19 09:53 PM


Karilea, unfortunately there's fat chance of me doing that Thank you darlin.


Ms Blues, glad you enjoyed the ride and thank you for your lovely comment

Enchantress thank you for the Awesome.. and hugs back at ya


Jwesley, perhaps it was the bourbon I had that evening that sent me sleeping with my eyes open heh. Thank you kind sir.

Thank you all

Maree

Have you any dreams you'd like to sell?

Stevie Nicks

Opeth
Senior Member
since 2001-12-13
Posts 1543
The Ravines
13 posted 2004-04-19 10:09 PM


Okay, this may sound weird, but this reminded me of a time I spent in Ireland... the drink in hand, wet pavement, bagpipes playing through the windows... and dark figures in the night. Cool!


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

14 posted 2004-04-20 09:38 AM


a shadow dancing silence wrapped
================================

how cool is that line and image...
So what does one eat before bed to dream poetry?
very cool write poetess Maree.

... and it's you ... you ... you ... you ...
the light changes when you're in the room.

M.B.

Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
15 posted 2004-04-20 09:53 PM


Hey, good to see you.   I loved the image this conjured up...and the feelings too.  Cold, dark, sort of fearful in a way...you've always been the queen of imagery.  Keep it up.

~*Krista Lee Knutson*~

We are, each of us angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another.
--Luciano De Crescenzo

INclan
Senior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 1024
Indiana, USA
16 posted 2004-04-20 10:56 PM


Been there, done that, don't want to again...

Very well said!

INclan

Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

17 posted 2004-04-22 10:15 AM


"all alone outside myself
the rivers hiss and bagpipes drone
and in climb of “get over it”
I stomp my foot  
in silent greet"

Silent greet..indeed...

as always dear one... truly a piece to enjoy and to think about....
many nights tinged as they are
with smoked bourbon tastes
from tumbler and ice
both fitting hand and soul
I slept not



Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
18 posted 2004-04-22 03:48 PM


I stomp my foot  
in silent greet
...
I yield the ground beneath my feet

..........
enjoyed your words so very much, Maree...

regards
sudhir


Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
19 posted 2004-04-22 03:52 PM



Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
20 posted 2004-04-22 10:32 PM


And do you think you'd be allowed to close them in the first place? An interesting notion, but unlikely.....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

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