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Open Poetry #31
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Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

0 posted 2004-03-05 10:47 AM


felt my pockets
for some loose change
Paul’s sound was singing, you see
.
.
.
knock knock, he said was,
knocking on heaven’s door
and the train was rolling
fast and furious down
the metro line

with both eyes closed
open hearted he seemed
with a voice as pure could be
though slightly out of sync
.
.
.
my heart had warmed
gladly as I felt my wallet
nobody had lifted it, you see
in all the rush of sound and
guitar string strummings

knock knock, he repeated was,
knocking on heaven’s door
and my wallet fell down
on the floor
.
.
.
calmly, I picked it up to find
a fine slit right through its throat
no coins and no notes to be seen
yet papers and cards were
fortunately left behind

knock knock had just robbed my world
and music felt like burning throbs
someone probably had just turned
a few Euros and some cents rich
.
.
.
the effect on me was rather sharp
I couldn’t tip Paul’s sound
for singing any more

hence I did what I knew best
I tied my chorus to the song
while knocking on heaven’s door
.
.
.
the next station arrived quite soon
and all the other passengers
left, cleaning their ears
thus clearing the carriage

me and Paul’s sound
blinked an eye or two
shrugged our shoulders
and knocked on even more
.
.
.
I had a few more stations to cross, you see


*** not really a true story ***


© Copyright 2004 Sudhir Iyer - All Rights Reserved
Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
1 posted 2004-03-05 11:07 AM


LOVED this! And even if it didn't happen to you, it no doubt rings a bell for some other reader down the rail. Good to read you, Sudhir.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
2 posted 2004-03-05 11:42 AM


wow! I'm sure it's happened somewhere...
Startime55
Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148
Alberta, Canada
3 posted 2004-03-05 12:10 PM


You weave magic with words that bring a story to life...well done...

Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
4 posted 2004-03-05 01:06 PM


Your poetry is always so interesting and a pleasure to read my friend. hugs, Chris

"At one glance
I love you
With a thousand hearts."


— Mihri Hatun, Turkish poet



    

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

5 posted 2004-03-05 01:47 PM


a generous story to share, along with some very excellent advice.  Thank you
Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
6 posted 2004-03-05 01:50 PM




Very cool story...

"sit on top of the world and tell me how you feel...'cause what you feel is what I feel for you.."
~Dido~

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
7 posted 2004-03-05 05:03 PM


Oh this is writing at it's best m'friend.
Very much enjoyed the read Sudhir!
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~ Time has cast a spell on you,
   So you won't ever forget me ~

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
8 posted 2004-03-05 05:29 PM


nice
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
9 posted 2004-03-05 05:33 PM


thank you all so very much...

much appreciated...

regards
sudhir

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