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Open Poetry #31
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My Lover
| Open Poetry #31 |
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My Lover |
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David2 Member
since 2000-03-22
Posts 407 |
My Lover My eyes will tear while picturing her face, My heart will pause if I recall her touch, And sadness from the lack of her embrace, Reminds me that I’ve never loved so much. So fondly I remember moments shared, Those many times we talked throughout the night, And relish love I’d dreamed but never dared, While knowing she still gives my heart delight. I love her with the urgency of life, As hearts must beat so must I love her still, And comfort her when she is seized with strife, Surrendering my heart and nerve and will. She is, in simple terms, the perfect blend, My lover, my companion, and my friend. [This message has been edited by David2 (02-20-2004 08:41 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2004 David William La Belle - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Grover Senior Member
since 2004-01-27
Posts 1967London, ON, Canada |
Very good, "I love her with the urgency of life," right on! Grover. |
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eminor_angel Member
since 2003-05-22
Posts 323Canada |
I typically encourage more figurative language in poetry, but many people write excellently with venacular. I agree with Grover, in that the line "I love her with the urgency of life" is the best, and I believe this shows promise in your poetry. Good start. |
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Youngatheart Member
since 2003-12-30
Posts 333 |
Well...I really like this part...in simple terms... She is, in simple terms, the perfect blend, My lover, my companion, and my friend. Wonderful!! |
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Hockeychick19 Member
since 2002-10-29
Posts 430Massachusetts, USA |
Beautiful write!  ~Kelly~ |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
David2 -- what a lovely and romantic poem this is! Enjoyed! |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
wow! very romantic! |
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Ravenwolfvoyager Member
since 2003-12-25
Posts 326 |
Excellent David, wow really I can relate to your work. You can see the souls eye open in these words. Thanks for the share David. |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big angel hugs) Oh David, I feel your deep yearning in these precious words, dearest friend, fear not, for love will always find a way if you keep the faith, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet David, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "You'll find something that's enough to keep you But if the bright lights don't receive you You should turn yourself around and come back home" MB20 |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Enjoyoed...James |
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HopeS Member Elite
since 2000-12-22
Posts 4596Perth Western Australia |
This shows a heart with feeling so beautifully expressed Hope |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
very lovely |
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