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Richy
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since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050


0 posted 2004-02-17 01:10 PM




Meat, It Does A Body Good?

Are you sick of Atkins yet?
The cows are on the run!
Carbs are now the latest,
Public Enemy Number One

The chickens are all striking,
that we all go back to veggies
Instead of all their wings and thighs,
without potato wedgies

God forbid that you should have,
a Cheez-It or a chip
But go ahead and fill your mouth,
with Cheeze Whiz till you drip!

Slowly back away from all that,
pasta, pie, and cake
“Drop the Twinkie now!” he said,
your weight loss is at stake

Don’t go for that Ho Ho!
You have way too much too lose!
I don’t want to bamboo shoot you!
There’s too much to choose

Would you like to try some of
this meat, without the loaf?
Try a hunk before you look,
at me like I’m an oaf!

Or how about a protein bar,
they’re chewy like a boot    
Hope you got a second job,
this stuff costs lots of loot!

Yeah, I miss my baked patater’s
with the stuff on top
Now I’m eating soybeans,
with a side order of chops!

I still go for burgers
but you’ll have to hold my buns!
The double quarter pounders,
with the lettuce are just fun!

No I don’t want french fries
cause my weight loss here’s at stake
But go ahead and Biggie Size
that little protein shake

No I can’t have doughnuts,
they shall never touch these lips
But I’ll take them nacho’s
just remember, hold the chips?

I don’t care if chickens came here
first, or else the eggs
All I know is that I’m eating omelets
filled with legs

Even Afleck says that you can cheat
while on the go?
He says there is always room,
to have some more J-Lo!

The blonde who snorted Sweet and Low
was really not a joke
She did it cause she thought she heard
that it was Diet Coke!

I cut myself the other day
and bacon grease shot out
If I eat another piece,
I’m gonna grow a snout!

Forget all this, I think I’m gonna,
go and have some cake
All this meat is too much bull,
for this old man to take!

If you fall off don’t get nervous,
try to reassert
And remember, stressed spelled backwards,
always spells desserts!

© Copyright 2004 Richy - All Rights Reserved
BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
1 posted 2004-02-17 01:16 PM


Nachos kind of lose their appeal without the chips, likewise the meat without the loaf.

This really had me laughing out loud!
methinks I'll start my diet tomorrow!  

You're too much fun Richy~

Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

2 posted 2004-02-17 01:27 PM




That’s true Bluesy, “Here everyone I’ve got nacho’s...
Chips? No, sorry, just use your fingers“  lol

And now when they say, “Don’t let your meat loaf”

They aint kidding are they...  


Thanks Bluesy, yeah I’m with you...
I don’t want to be laying on the beach, this summer
and someone tries to push me back in... lol






Mistletoe Angel
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since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
3 posted 2004-02-17 03:59 PM




(giggles in delight) Arrrrrr...and methinks Long John Silver should hush them puppies and stop puttin' his shrimp in the popcorn pail! (giggles) Hey, have you seen those new Big Dippers commericals from McDonalds, I'm like "OK, no hurt feelings, I shall tread softly away from the chicken zone!" (giggles) I love this, sweet friend, time for a grapefruit diet, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Richy, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"You'll find something that's enough to keep you
But if the bright lights don't receive you
You should turn yourself around and come back home" MB20

ParisGrl
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 610

4 posted 2004-02-17 04:15 PM


Richy,

This is really cute!  I enjoyed it very much.

Take Care,
~Laura~

MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...
5 posted 2004-02-17 04:27 PM


Very clever write, Richy.  Veganism, all the way!

-MVS

You CAN make a difference:
http://educate-yourself.org/

muted
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Member Elite
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving
6 posted 2004-02-17 06:30 PM


wheres the lentils?
LMAO

very funny write

Youngatheart
Member
since 2003-12-30
Posts 333

7 posted 2004-02-17 06:42 PM



Even Afleck says that you can cheat
while on the go?
He says there is always room,
to have some more J-Lo!

The blonde who snorted Sweet and Low
was really not a joke
She did it cause she thought she heard
that it was Diet Coke!

Richy,
BRAVO BRAVO BRAVO....
This is so funny.
After being on a somewhat Atkins diet for almost 9 months...this is such a refreshing read. Cute, really cute!!!  Youngatheart

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
8 posted 2004-02-17 08:14 PM


Richy

I like those burgers in lettuce...Yum!  And, I like you too...you are too cute!!  

Grover
Senior Member
since 2004-01-27
Posts 1967
London, ON, Canada
9 posted 2004-02-17 08:19 PM


What a laugh... and you're making me hungry as well! Grover.
jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
10 posted 2004-02-17 08:30 PM


What a hoot!  Laughed all the way.  Terrific write.

jwesley

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
11 posted 2004-02-17 08:35 PM


go veggie,
spare the cow

HopeS
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since 2000-12-22
Posts 4596
Perth Western Australia
12 posted 2004-02-17 10:25 PM


Fun, fun , fun Richy .... next time I'm stressed I am off to get desserts , loved the turn around of the stressed word LOL , that topped the whole diet thing off nicely

Hope

passing shadows
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since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
13 posted 2004-02-18 02:42 AM


hehehe....this is adorable!
Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

14 posted 2004-02-18 02:48 AM




Noah ~ Arrrr yes Matey... I agree about ol Long John (Tarnished) Silver. If only him and his swabbie Toe “dish-rag“ Blackbeard, would just put a little more grog into the batter, then into their flasks, then we might actually find a piece of meat somewhere in those muck balls, they’ve been trying to pass as regular mush puppies... Arrrghhh..   Thanks Noah!!!  

ParisGrl ~ It’s very nice to meet you Laura! Thanks so much for stopping by, and for the nice comments

Mark ~ Veganism eh Mark?  I owned one of those once... worse car Chevy ever made...
Oh! I’m sorry... You were talking about the planet, Spock came from.. oh please forgive me... I hear they’re diet makes your ears pointy... but that's probably just a rumor...  

Dawn ~ Lentils, Dawn? Now don’t think I don’t know what you’re talking about... lol  Ummm, yeah, I think you can have a few of those now and then... but they’re kind of hard to digest aren’t they? At least that’s what someone told me once?  :


Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

15 posted 2004-02-18 02:49 AM



Martie ~ Martie, now is that cute as in... Springer Spaniel Puppy cute... ?
Or is that cute, as in, little slobbering two toothed Bull Dog puppy cute... ?

I was just curious...  

Oh yeah... and I kinda like you too...

Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

16 posted 2004-02-18 02:51 AM




Youngster ~  Hi Young’un, yeah, I’ve also somewhat been on the old Atkins myself... and guess what? I, even somewhat, lost some weight...       somewhat...     Thanks Youngatheart!

Grover ~ Grover, they say laughter is the best medicine... but I guess as far as a food...
It really stinks, doesn‘t it... lol  

Jwesley ~ Thanks so much Jimmy for stopping by. That was a real welcomed surprise!
I’m glad you liked it!  

Michelle ~ Michelle, honestly... I don’t think I could ever do that. I would miss it too much... Thanks Michelle


Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

17 posted 2004-02-18 02:52 AM




Hope ~ Well Hope, when you do... would you mind picking me up like a little something? You know... something small, like a little, four or five layered chocolate Raspberry cake, maybe with chopped walnuts, and whipped cream frosting on top... you know, just a little something, to tide me over, till lunchtime....  Oh... and don‘t tell anyone, okay?  Thanks!  

Dixie ~ Thanks Dixie! I’m so glad you liked it!  


Youngatheart
Member
since 2003-12-30
Posts 333

18 posted 2004-02-18 04:09 AM


Richy, Keep up the good work with the carb counting....it does work. I am now down 125 lbs. and feeling fantastic!!! and oh, btw, keep entertaining us with your very witty poetry. Youngster
Sadelite
Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519

19 posted 2004-02-18 05:50 AM


What a cute one.  LOved the end, stressed spelled backward is dessert!  Too cute and very realllll!
               Sadie

suthern
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since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
20 posted 2004-02-18 10:33 AM


ROFLMAO... On the morning after a day when no chocolate was safe from me... (though they did all manage to outrun me, darnit! *G* But then... a hungover slug could outrun me *G*)... this is just delightful! *S*
Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

21 posted 2004-02-18 10:57 AM





Youngatheart ~ Wow Young One! Congratulations! That is amazing. You must really be enjoying this remarkable achievement. Well, I’m very happy for you! Yeah, all the kidding aside in my poem, yes, those nasty little starches are the root of so much of our society’s health problems. Yes, lean proteins, and dark green veggies is the key. Just cut out all the sugars, and processed starches, and dang you’ll get results. Good for you Young one. You’re a role model, for anyone who thinks it can’t be done. Again, Congrats. What a wonderful achievement!


Sadie ~ Thanks so much Sadie. I’m glad you liked it!  

Suthern ~ LOL Suthern... you’re too funny...Do you know what the snail said on top of the Turtle?  WEEEEEeeeeeeEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeEEEEeeeeee!!!!!!!!  
I don’t know... I think some jokes just weren’t meant to be told in writing... lol

Thanks Everyone!  

Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
22 posted 2004-02-18 06:03 PM


"I'm lovin it"


you have a wonderful personality.....

~~**~~
There are moments when speech
is but a mouth pressed lightly and
humbly against the angel's hands.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
23 posted 2004-02-18 06:11 PM


Hey Richy!!
All this talk of food after not eating since Sunday makes me want to raid the fridge!
I needed a chuckle today and found it right here.
Thanks for this and for your concern once again.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

*SHEEEEE'S BAAAAAACK!!*

  ~ Whatever our souls are made of,
      his and mine are the same. ~      
            

steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

24 posted 2004-02-18 06:17 PM


too funny...once again, you have shown your mastery of wit...hmmmm...time to have a double tofu burger with peanut butter and mustard on a corn meal tortilla (don't knock it 'til you try it)
Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
25 posted 2004-02-18 06:44 PM


Richy - enjoyed this one for sure...

BC

Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

26 posted 2004-02-18 11:57 PM




Lauren ~ Lauren, that was such a nice thing to say! That really touched me, thank you  

Nancy ~ Nancy, I thought I was watching, “The Poltergeist” all over again... “Sheeee’s Baaaack! LOL
Nancy, the carbs are a no no, but you can have some roast beast... lol  I know you couldn’t eat because of personal reasons, and I’m glad to hear, that your up and feeling so good already... Great News!!!


Steaven ~ Thanks Steaven.. I think I’m happiest, when I’m making a fool out of myself... lol Steve, I was going along with the vittles, until you snuck in that peanut butter... I think I’ll take mine on the side please... lol  

Bill ~ Bill, always a big pleasure to see you stop by! I hope all is well with you. Thanks so much for the warm comments!  




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