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Open Poetry #31
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Before I Rise
| Open Poetry #31 |
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Before I Rise |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA 
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Cavernous, this silence that stands somberly before me. Steps upon the cobbled stone echo ominously....yet are not heard. Listen, hear the faint pitter of the pattering heart, see the lighted window high. Whisper the veiled desire and raise the wondering eyes, in hope. Will a shadow blanket the cool stone as so gentle a breeze ruffles the awaiting sea before sleeping gales knock the window’s pane? Will the stallion boldly nuzzle the mare, that love might be shared amongst the oats that lie in subtle heaps? Hark, my dear....for ‘neath the window I gallantly, proudly stand...in wait of but a glance of lace flowing from my sight....and then I pray to dream....that once more the lace shall appear...so delicately touch my lids...as my need stirs forth a dreamer’s moon...before I rise. |
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| © Copyright 2004 Barry J. Tackett - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Enjoyed read this, Mostly felt the flow, Those dots always throw me off I prefer line breaks instead Makes the pause with less disruption (My opinion) Gloom |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Thanx Gloom, appreciate your input...How do you insert line breaks....curious to know. Seems I have grown into the little dots, so to speak. And now they are a part of all I write...sheesh! |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
"Hark, my dear....for ‘neath the window I gallantly, proudly stand...in wait of but a glance of lace flowing from my sight....and then I pray to dream....that once more the lace shall appear...so delicately touch my lids...as my need stirs forth a dreamer’s moon...before I rise." What a romantic soul you are, Magnus....(notice the dots).... I enjoyed these wistful lines. |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (smiles) Awwwwwwwwww, this is another beautiful romance ramble, sweet friend, and may these feelings echo when after you rise, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Barry, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "You'll find something that's enough to keep you |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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Kazm Member
since 2003-11-13
Posts 99 |
You have a good touch. I want to write more like you do, serious but looking in as well as out. Kaz |
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Grover Senior Member
since 2004-01-27
Posts 1967London, ON, Canada |
A gracious, smooth flowing poem with very good images! Grover. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Magnus, line breaks, as I think the Prof is suggesting, would be similar to this... Hark, my dear for ‘neath the window I gallantly, proudly stand in wait of but a glance of lace flowing from my sight and then I pray to dream that once more the lace shall appear so delicately touch my lids as my need stirs forth a dreamer’s moon before I rise. But that's just my guess! Oh yea...ditto on what everyone else had to say...  |
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Terrina Member
since 2003-12-31
Posts 166California |
you are outstanding |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
nice  |
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Sadelite Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519 |
This sang itself to me-I could have listened and dreamed all day. Masterfully crafted. ~Sadie~ |
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