Bloodstained Tiles (a morbid piece from the authors imagination)

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EvocativeVerse2
Senior Member

since 2003-09-10

Posts 1279

0 posted 2004-02-06 12:10 PM

Bloodstained Tiles

Stillborn eyes see naught. They are glass.
Liquid mirrors that throw back all
they capture with no warmth of their
own. Such are not windowpanes to
the soul. Rather they’re shards, lancets
appetent to open a vein.

Crimson drops. Crimson drops. Crimson...

Bloodstained tiles meet the press of face.
Fettered to an utter darkness
stillborn lungs expel a last breath.

Remember, if you're not part of the future, you're history!

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

1 posted 2004-02-06 12:54 PM

Extraordinary writing -- this could be taken so many ways. What a painful situation!

froggy
Senior Member

since 2003-06-23

Posts 1893
Michigan

2 posted 2004-02-06 01:36 PM

Very interesting.
Your imagination is still just as good
as you my dear friend.
I love this piece.

:-)

Sadelite
Member Elite

since 2003-10-11

Posts 2519

3 posted 2004-02-06 01:58 PM

EV,
   ON MY GOODNESS, this is goooooood!
Lots  of levels here...  I think this is my favorite of yours, though you believe your imagination to have been morbid.  (It's not morbid to me because I think I know what you may have intended.  Incredible write, ev.
         ~Sadelite

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

4 posted 2004-02-06 02:04 PM

EvocativeVerse2
Strong write, enjoyed the read.

Snow

Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

5 posted 2004-02-07 03:00 AM

i hope this doesn't offend anyone.. but...

this is my kinda poetry. your line breaks are great(though not everyone will agree with that) .. i can only speak for myself. i think you made the most of each word. minimal and yet.. powerful
LOVE IT!!!

and.. in a way, reminds me of me ... i hope that's not taken in the wrong way. i swear it's not ego speaking.

i'm rambling.. LOL i have a tendency to do that.... lol (as you noticed)

annnnnnyway, did i mention i love this?!!?

*smile*

snow

"yet each man kills the thing he loves
by each let this be heard,
some do it with a bitter look,
some with a flattering word"
oscar wilde

EvocativeVerse2
Senior Member

since 2003-09-10

Posts 1279

6 posted 2004-02-07 03:08 AM

Thank-you all for reading this. I really appreciate the comments. Snow...I think that is the best thumbs up anyone as ever given me! WOW! Thank-you my friend and you're not being egotistical. This was a direct attempt to write you! I'm glad you like it and see yourself relected in my eyes. Every pun intended.

Remember, if you're not part of the future, you're history!

Richy
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 3050

7 posted 2004-02-07 03:24 AM

Hi Kevin,

Hey, I liked this. Especially those cold liquid mirrors.
It’s tough when your heart and soul get so squeezed
down, that all of your senses, one by one start to shut
out all but the faintest of dark blue, and grays...

Sure it’s possible to eek your way out... but then so is
climbing out of the Grand Canyon, at night...

Thanks for the reminder Kevin

You wrote this well

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

8 posted 2004-02-07 10:23 AM

Oh wow....this may be entirely from imagination, but you give it an air of complete reality. Haunting!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Grover
Senior Member

since 2004-01-27

Posts 1967
London, ON, Canada

9 posted 2004-02-07 11:12 AM

Exceptional, vivid images! Grover.

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

10 posted 2004-02-07 01:10 PM

(big angel hugs) Oh Kevin, this is darker than your usual writes but just as wonderful, sweet friend, I love versatility and your heart shines with its poetic gift, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Kevin, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"You'll find something that's enough to keep you
But if the bright lights don't receive you
You should turn yourself around and come back home" MB20

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

11 posted 2004-02-07 01:36 PM

I kept passing by this one because of the title...I don't have a strong stomach...but I could not resist...it was just begging me to read

Ringo

Member Elite

since 2003-02-20

Posts 3684
Saluting with misty eyes

12 posted 2004-02-07 01:57 PM

Morbid is right.
Graet Job.

But now the animal is in pain...
And now it's starting to rain...
But I'm still the same.

Snow

Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

13 posted 2004-02-07 03:36 PM

had to come back.

~S

"yet each man kills the thing he loves
by each let this be heard,
some do it with a bitter look,
some with a flattering word"
oscar wilde

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