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Open Poetry #31
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I Miss Her
| Open Poetry #31 |
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I Miss Her |
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McLean Member
since 2004-01-05
Posts 484state of marital bliss |
What must I do to relieve this subtle ache resulting from an action I was hesitant to take? When will I stop seeing the ice blue of your eyes and when will I quit feeling your life I compromised? I lock the doors as usual double checking the security It's then I miss your protective gaze looking back at me. I feel your tiny, tender paw upon my upper leg as you always craved attention for my undivided, you did beg. I see your territory outside the pane of glass and imagine you're still playing there digging up our wanted grass. The gardenias seem so still now since behind them you don't lay. Your dish is filled with remnants of what you left on that last day. Still beneath the water heater your tattered blanket waits for you to circle three times and settle into place. Your leash is hanging idly in the foyer by the door waiting for another walk like all the days before. There really was no alternative and I know the decision was right but I miss you, so, my 4-legged child, especially in the quiet of night. Eleven years we spent being comfort to each other and expecting each day would lead from one right to another. I wasn't ready yet, to say good-bye, my friend and I'm so so very sorry about how your life did end. It's not the same without you, And my heart continues to break. I hope that you forgive me for the decision I had to make. Rest, beneath your favorite garden bench, in peace, always. Freckles January 1993 - January 2004 |
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| © Copyright 2004 McLean - All Rights Reserved | |||
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
for our family, it was Shadow, and there are few decisions so hard when you've grown so close... |
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Richy Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050 |
This is so sad McLean. A cat we've had for 11 years has been missing for two weeks. We went to the animal shelter, and put flyers around the neighborhood but, nothing. Do older cats just up and leave, when they know their about to pass away? For some reason, that's what I think happened. I'm really sorry to hear about your Freckles. I'm sure he was just the best little dog. I don't know if you planned it or not. But when I look at your poem, it looks like a dog sitting up, begging for a treat perhaps. Or better yet, he's simply sitting there, wagging his tail, looking up at the family, he's always loved... Thank You McLean I needed this  |
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McLean Member
since 2004-01-05
Posts 484state of marital bliss |
Thanks, Richy, for your kind response. I'm very sorry to hear you have a missing family member. They really are, you know...members. I have always heard that when a cat is ill, or "dying", for lack of a better way to say it, that they do sort of disappear. Suits their personalities, I think...not wanting to be a bother...kind of being private in the end. I've had a number of cat family members in the past, and this seems to have happened more times than not. Freckles was a very good dog, but with a questionable behavior around others, including my kids and husband. I always felt very responsible for her, for her care, and in the end, I had to make a decision for safety reasons which I regretted having to do. Regardless of circumstance, I miss her tremendously. Again, thank you. McLean |
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Richy Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050 |
Thanks for that information McLean. That’s what I thought happened to cats in that very unfortunate situation. It happened to a cat or two of ours when we we’re kids. But I just thought they ran away, to get away from us... lol Not really that funny... but any who... I wonder why a cat would take off like that when they know their time is near? In a strange way, its kind of dignified way of doing something that personal. But then, I’ve heard of people having a heart attack and denying it so long, that they’ve actually worsened their situation, or even worse. Well, I didn’t mean to tell my life story here... sorry... lol You take good care McLean I appreciate all the support you’ve given me, and I’m really glad your here with us...  |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
 awwwww...gawd! this tears me up |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
McLean, I'm so sorry. Every creature I've ever owned has had this effect on me, too. It was the worst though with a little dog I had from ages 7-16, so bad that I would dream about her -- she was always running away from me in my dream and I couldn't catch her, which would be the furthest from the way she really was -- I cried for days. |
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Laoha Member
since 2003-03-07
Posts 161Nevada, USA |
You have to let it go, do what's best for you. Time cures. |
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HopeS Member Elite
since 2000-12-22
Posts 4596Perth Western Australia |
Awww this is so sad , but I know what you are going through, we had to put our little princess Zelda to sleep and she was in our family for 14 years , yes we spent days shedding tears ..... now we have two more dogs that are spoilt and my husband gives them much more attention than me .... if fact I call them his other women Hope |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Dear, I know this. My first dog, Bobo [real name, Ruffles...but how is a 18 month old supposed to say Ruffles? Bobo...  ] was with me until I reached the age of 10. She would have lived a little longer, had she not watched RinTinTin so much and rescued my younger sister from falling into an old oil pit. She kept my sister from falling in, but she lost her footing and fell, instead.We rescued her, tried to clean her as best we could, but unfortunately, in trying to clean herself, she ingested oils, stagnant waters and larvae... I remember that my folks put her down to keep her out misery. I still think of her, 40 years later. Dogs and cats, birds, and some other animals, become family when treated with love and respect and kindness, because most generally they give all of that back to us, unconditionally, as best they can. My heart is beating with yours. |
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Copperbell Senior Member
since 2003-11-08
Posts 956 |
So sad, I still think I'm going to see my dog when I'm coming up the drive. It's a strange thing that there becomes that love between a human and an animal. Very cool though. |
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Kie Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 77USA |
My heart goes out to you. This brought tears to my eyes. I have two dogs and to lose either would break my heart. Hang in there, I hope it gets easier for you. Kie |
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ParisGrl Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 610 |
Mclean, I am so very sorry. I know how it feels to lose a pet. Take Care, ~Laura~ |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
McLean Your words really hit home to me and the tears flowed so freely as I read your heartfelt words. We have a 15 year old kelpie shepherd X we got from the dogs home when he was 6 weeks old. We brought him when we came back from our honeymoon and he was part of our family before our daughter came along three years later. Lately, his back legs keep collapsing, his sight is very poor and he can hardly hear. He has had a wonderful life and we adore him but I just know the time is getting nearer when we must make the decision you so sadly had to make. I try to push that thought away but know it is only a matter of time before we must decide. I can only begin to try and understand what you must be going through and that may be me soon. Thank you for writing such a heartfelt poem. Take care.......Sue I am in motion |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (tears fall down my cheeks) Oh McLean, I'm so so sorry to hear this, sweet friend, your Freckles sounded like such an adorable and cute puppy, and I know how heartbreaking it is to lose man's (and woman's) best friend as to me it feels just like losing a friend or child, as when I was a little boy I had two kittys named Suky and Holly and loved them soooooooo much but one day Suky ran away when scared by a neighbor and Holly died of sickness! Just the thought makes me cry so much as I love my kittys forever as I love all of Gods creatures! (wipes tears) I send many angel healing and comfort hugs your way, sweet friend, Freckles will always be so happy she had you as her owner, as you are the most loving owner she could ever ask for, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet McLean, thank you for sharing!May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "You'll find something that's enough to keep you |
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Ludo Junior Member
since 2004-01-29
Posts 23 |
Just to mirror the above comments; a brilliant poem. Well written and obviously sad, yet something which will stay with you forever. Beautiful. |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Your poem is endearing and I feel for you McClean. ~hugs~ |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
McLean - mine too was lost after 12 years. A heart was hurting for a long time... BC |
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