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muted
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since 2004-01-15
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Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving

0 posted 2004-02-02 10:38 AM


I recieved news today that my 47 year old father is dying...too young to leave with so many regrets. And to him this poem is an unseen dedication.
**For support to comfort myself, my brother, my mother, and especially my father....never knew i could cry for him until now**

~
~
~
Deluge Before the Requiem
-------------------------

I found myself suspended,
hanging from the moment
with grip loosening,
waiting for letting go
and moving on...

You were never there to catch me,
and the waves cant carry
me back to reclaim
the vacancies from
when i left you
drowning in regrets.

The distance kept growing
between right and wrong
and i should have called
but i swallowed my youth
and moved on.

...Was so easy once,
saying goodbye...

Anger has a way of
making everything
seem alright.
Wish you could have
seen me growing
adapting, progressing
towards enlightenment
or maybe just to
see me admit my regret
for forgetten beginings
and lost causes.

You got a long way to walk
cause the path to forgiveness
goes all the way to the soul.
...and this is yours alone...

I know you're going
and no amount of promising
is going stop this journey.
And i cry for you
a deluge;
not because ive forgotten
but because ive accepted
we all make mistakes.

...was so easy once, saying goodbye..

[This message has been edited by muted (02-02-2004 11:18 AM).]

© Copyright 2004 Dawn van Krieken-Smith - All Rights Reserved
Kie
Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 77
USA
1 posted 2004-02-02 11:09 AM


I loved the title. The poem was sad, hurt feelings expressed but also it expressed how you feel. My condolescences in regards to your father. I really liked your poem alot and I hope time will heal all your pain.
choshi
Senior Member
since 2004-01-01
Posts 1184
New York
2 posted 2004-02-02 11:16 AM


Dawn,

After three readings here, I am still mostly speechless. There is so much emotion of all kinds threaded into this beautiful poem...SO bittersweet. Stirs up feelings of losing my father [a man who was hard to know and it left the question burning within: "How does one grieve the loss of a person who one never really had?]  May your path through this loss be gentle and fruitful...*Hugs*  ~P

Toerag
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since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
3 posted 2004-02-02 03:12 PM


A bittersweet thought, well penned..needs to go back to the top.....
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
4 posted 2004-02-03 01:21 PM


This is stunning... The final line says so much... Beautiful work!
iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
5 posted 2004-02-03 01:23 PM


What a big heart you have, Muted!  I am sorry for the pain you are feeling and for your family.  ...........hugs to you, jo
GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
6 posted 2004-02-03 02:42 PM


Oh this is powerful...
I'm completely speechless from it,
But I wish you comfort,
and hope that things can be okay
before you need to say goodbye.
I think I'll try to call, and work on forgiving, my mom...
even though she's the one who left......

Always, Alyssa

He was a man of sorrows
...I am a girl of tears.

steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

7 posted 2004-02-03 03:25 PM


amazing, obviously heart-felt write...the line:

"the path to forgiveness
goes all the way to the soul"

is outstanding.

Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
8 posted 2004-02-03 03:30 PM




(big angel hugs) Oh Dawn, I'm so sorry to hear of your father, sweet friend, I understand just how you feel as it too would sound sudden to me but know that despite the regrets and lack of closeness you may have had sometimes, deep down he always loved you, loves you, and always will love you and I know he will be forgiven by your gentle heart, God Bless You, I send angel comfort hugs to you and your family, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Dawn, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"You'll find something that's enough to keep you
But if the bright lights don't receive you
You should turn yourself around and come back home" MB20

Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

9 posted 2004-02-03 07:00 PM




Oh Dawn, I am so sorry about your father
not being well.

It is especially sad that he didn't get
to see what a special person you are.

I hope that you will be able to see him
soon. I can't think of anything more, that
would comfort him.


My thoughts and prayers,
are with you and yours.


Richy


nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
10 posted 2004-02-03 07:08 PM


You were never there to catch me,
and the waves cant carry
me back to reclaim
the vacancies from
when i left you
drowning in regrets.
well done, Dawn..and I am sorry you are going through this
hugs
Maureen

gadfly4you
Junior Member
since 2004-01-24
Posts 37

11 posted 2004-02-03 09:14 PM


Very powerful....and bittersweet....I am truly sorry for you
BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
12 posted 2004-02-03 09:24 PM


Aww Dawn, thank you for this heart speak.
I am so sorry for the pain you are feeling.

Warm hugs for you good poetess.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
13 posted 2004-02-04 03:57 AM


oh my...

what a touch, what emotion...so bittersweet

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
14 posted 2004-02-04 03:58 AM


many warm hugs to you Dawn
muted
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Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving
15 posted 2004-02-04 04:46 AM


I want to say that all of you are very very sweet for reading this and offering your support...thank you for being such thoughtful poetfriends.

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
16 posted 2004-02-04 03:47 PM


appreciate the tone and intent of the poem, but have to say, the title Rocks!
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
17 posted 2004-02-04 03:52 PM


Amazing write...just so powerful!
Heart hugs to you sweet lady.
and...never give up hope!

~ I like not only to be loved,
   but to be told I am loved ~
                
            

Grover
Senior Member
since 2004-01-27
Posts 1967
London, ON, Canada
18 posted 2004-02-04 04:05 PM


Honest but sorrowful. Grover.
Sadelite
Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519

19 posted 2004-03-05 08:20 PM


muted,

   I'm very sorry to hear about what you and
and your family are going through.   Your poem is wonderfully expressive, giving me a picture of the kind heart you have.  Be well.
                Sadelite

Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
20 posted 2004-03-05 10:41 PM


muted, I'm so sorry.  It's not easy, no matter what their age is. This is a beautiful poem.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

sea_of_okc
Senior Member
since 1999-06-15
Posts 568
Oklahoma City, OK, USA
21 posted 2004-03-05 10:55 PM


A very emotional piece... made me want to cry for your hurts but also made my spirit smile for the beautiful heart that lies behind these words...
Goldenrose
Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665

22 posted 2004-03-06 04:28 AM


Dawn....what can i say...sorry to hear the very sad news...the poem was just a perfect reflection of how your heart is at this difficult time....my deepest prayers i send to you across the miles.....

Goldenrose.

''Each soul is potentialy divine..the goal is to manifest that divinity''

aujussy wolf
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Michigan
23 posted 2004-03-08 11:15 PM


there is always hope muted , i know a few people one related whowas given an amount of time by the doctors ...a short time , that person is still here to this day in fair health .....healing starts within the heart..
i feel with your love he will make it

Hugs, J



-Wolf

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