Not That Special - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

mgoodman1989
Member

since 2006-03-05

Posts 93
Iowa, USA

0 posted 2006-08-20 07:27 PM

HOW DOES A GUY LIKE YOU
LIKE A GIRL LIKE ME?
I'M NOT ALL THAT SPECIAL
WHAT DO YOU SEE?

WE MET ON A BUS
WHEN WE WERE FIFTEEN
A YEAR LATER
LIES A BEAUTIFUL SCENE

AS IF FROM A FAIRYTALE
OUT OF A BOOK
I NEVER THOUGHT
YOU'D GIVE ME A SECOND LOOK

HUNDREDS OF MILES AWAY
YET HOURS ON THE PHONE
BEING AWAY FROM YOU
A NEW SENSE OF 'ALONE'

I FINALLY RETURN HOME
TO ''I LOVE YOU''
THEN SUDDENLY YOU DON'T
WHAT DID I DO?

REFUSING TO TELL ME
FOR FEAR OF THE TRUTH
IF WE CAN'T BE HONEST
THEN WHAT IS THE USE?

FINALLY WE DISCUSS IT
AND MAKE OUR AMENDS
THE SADNESS IS GONE
MY FRUSTRATION ENDS

YOU ASKED ME THE QUESTION
I'VE BEEN DYING TO HEAR
I RESPOND QUICKLY
WHILE I SWALLOW A TEAR

YOU SAID YOU WERE AFRAID
THAT YOU MIGHT LOSE ME
BUT THAT WON'T HAPPEN
I'M LUCKY YOU SEE?

YOU KNOW MY MISTAKES
YET YOU DONT RUN AWAY
I'LL LOVE YOU FOR EVER
I JUST HOPE THAT YOU'LL STAY

[This message has been edited by mgoodman1989 (08-22-2006 04:00 PM).]

Tempest
Member

since 2006-04-28

Posts 247
dont eat paint chips!!!!

1 posted 2006-08-20 08:46 PM

A little confusing in parts but overall great write. I did love the rhyme in this piece. it flowed well, sometimes when you write(well when i write,anyway)I just cant get the words to come so i force them out and it sounds all twisted and dumb. This poem is the complete opposite, so good job.
love ya
Tempest

mgoodman1989
Member

since 2006-03-05

Posts 93
Iowa, USA

2 posted 2006-08-21 04:31 PM

Thanks tempest.

stargal
Senior Member

since 2006-03-06

Posts 1352
OR USA

3 posted 2006-08-21 05:34 PM

Hi mgoodman1989,

Nice poem! I didn't find it to be that confusing so I must be missing something...

I also liked the rhyme in this, nothing seemed forced, it just seemed to flow really well.

The only thing I dislike is the caps, it's kind of annoying. Yet, that could just be me once again.

Thanks for sharing, I really enjoyed reading this one

"I pray thee, O God, that I
may be beautiful within."
–Socrates
@-->---

mgoodman1989
Member

since 2006-03-05

Posts 93
Iowa, USA

4 posted 2006-08-22 04:01 PM

Sorry about the Caps Stargal... Actually, the Caps on our computer was stuck... so lol yeah, it ended up all being caps....

Thanks for the replies!

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.