navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #7 » I love you so much
Teen Poetry #7
Post A Reply Post New Topic I love you so much Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
mgoodman1989
Member
since 2006-03-05
Posts 93
Iowa, USA

0 posted 2006-08-19 02:20 PM


The look on your face
as you look in my eyes
you say you can't tell me
how your feeling inside

You say you can't tell me
that your way to shy
I feel the same way
I blush and I hide

I'm the same way
and I think the same thoughts
we'd be good together
I like you a lot

We'd be good together
I know that its true
we'll walk arm in arm
just me and you

We'll walk arm in arm
till our lips softly touch
a match made in heaven
I love you so much


© Copyright 2006 Michelle Elizabeth Goodman - All Rights Reserved
broken_smile1469
Member
since 2006-07-02
Posts 104

1 posted 2006-08-20 02:06 AM


great write! i thought it was a little bit repetitive in parts but that could just be me

but i can definently relate to this! i am very shy so it sounds like something i would write. well Great Job!

cherrys_rule
Member
since 2006-03-18
Posts 442

2 posted 2006-08-20 03:11 PM


yeah I can relate to this poem I like it alot. Although there were oarts that repeated themselves, but other then that Great write.
cherrys_rule
Member
since 2006-03-18
Posts 442

3 posted 2006-08-20 03:11 PM


yeah I can relate to this poem I like it alot. Although there were parts that repeated themselves, but other then that Great write.
mgoodman1989
Member
since 2006-03-05
Posts 93
Iowa, USA
4 posted 2006-08-20 07:15 PM


Reptition, right, okay.... lol I'll work on that?

Thanks for the posts!!!

Much love,

Michelle

stargal
Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352
OR USA
5 posted 2006-08-21 05:44 PM


I'm afraid that I must agree with everything said above^^

Yet, even though it did repeat itself, I found that I liked the poem a lot when I ignored the repetitiveness.  I think it's a great general idea that just needs a little more polish to it, no offence.

I loved the "shy" part, it's something I can relate too, by far that would be my favorite part...

Thanks for sharing

"I pray thee, O God, that I
may be beautiful within."
–Socrates
                     @-->---

the_girl_next_door
Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591
USA
6 posted 2006-08-21 11:28 PM


Very sweet and simple..

Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes.
Want nothing & you will have everything.

mgoodman1989
Member
since 2006-03-05
Posts 93
Iowa, USA
7 posted 2006-08-22 03:48 PM


After another boring day, I log on to pip, reading thru the recent responses (especially stargals) I had to smile. Thanks for saying its 1 of ur favorites lol made me feel really good.

Much love,
Michelle


Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #7 » I love you so much

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary