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Teen Poetry #7
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silentmage13
Junior Member
since 2005-11-20
Posts 14
Florida

0 posted 2006-08-15 07:07 PM


I seek comfort in eyes so sweet.
I yearn for a love so very deep.
Only you have conquered my soul.
Only you can make my life whole.
All the stars shining in the sky
Can't compete with our love's high.
If only they could truly see,
That it's you who sets me free.
If only they could truly know,
It's thoughts of you that let me hope-
Hope for a brand new sweet day
Where I can live life my own way
With you by side through it all.
For you have yet to let me fall.
Call it what you will or may,
But I call it love each day.
You are my harbor in every storm;
Only you take on my lover's form.
And I dream of that one moment
I take your name in sweet consent,
When I am yours and you are mine.
Why do they see our passion as crime?


© Copyright 2006 Alisha Olsen - All Rights Reserved
broken_smile1469
Member
since 2006-07-02
Posts 104

1 posted 2006-08-17 12:54 PM


i LOVED this poem! i thought the flow was great the rythming was great. and i could relate to it so much!! Awesome Job on this!!! can't wait to read more
stargal
Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352
OR USA
2 posted 2006-08-17 01:33 PM


"If only they could truly see,
That it's you who sets me free.
If only they could truly know,
It's thoughts of you that let me hope-
Hope for a brand new sweet day
Where I can live life my own way"


Wow!! This part was my favorite in the whole poem! Yet, believe me, it took me forever to choose a favorite part, the whole poem is just amazing!

The ending with the question wasn't what I thought was going to happen, it was nice though, kind of put a little twist on the whole thing. Great job with this poem, it is a pleasurable read... Thanks for sharing!

"I pray thee, O God, that I
may be beautiful within."
–Socrates
                     @-->---

the_girl_next_door
Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591
USA
3 posted 2006-08-17 10:01 PM


I haven't been in here in a while. I have a lot of catching up to do. I loved this poem.. I can relate to some parts.. this was great.. since you haven't heard it from me, WELCOME TO PIP!!

~heather~

Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes.
Want nothing & you will have everything.

silentmage13
Junior Member
since 2005-11-20
Posts 14
Florida
4 posted 2006-08-21 02:04 PM


Thank you. This poem was one of my favorites to create. Finding someone who matches those descriptions is the hardest part though. lol
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navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #7 » Crime of Passion

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