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Teen Poetry #7
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synthetic
Member
since 2006-06-10
Posts 70
ontario, canada

0 posted 2006-08-03 10:39 PM


I always find myself fighting them back the demons that haunt me
And it seems like I’m pushing away the only ones that want me
That’s Johnny for you
Never afraid to stand his ground
And when his heart hit the floor he didn’t make a sound
He looked ahead and kept his pace
Believed in continuity and wouldn’t show the hurt on his face
Pain just stops you and forces you to feel
That the nightmare you pushed aside is based on something real
And although it hurts badly it’ll never kill
Just vacate your soul with a hole that it’ll never fill

I swear she saw me on the other side of the hall
And wore that shirt I got her cause I’d see her at the mall
That’s Johnny for you
Never afraid to admit that like the others he’s been played
And not too proud to admit he’s ashamed
She held his hand as he watched from a distance
And smiled effortlessly like she hadn’t even missed him
Ya it’s a fact she’s already moved on
And my picture on her wall is already long gone
That’s Johnny
She took his picture and burned it on a cross
Took a picture of it tattooed on sorry your loss
She loved him
It was so evident


© Copyright 2006 luc - All Rights Reserved
stargal
Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352
OR USA
1 posted 2006-08-04 04:11 PM


I'm not sure that I understood the whole poem together but I did like what I though I understood. You have a way with words that helps make things descriptive; which is enjoyable. Plus you say it straight and don’t muddle the whole thing up with useless phrases/words.

Great job on this poem, it was a pleasure to read

@-->---

the_girl_next_door
Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591
USA
2 posted 2006-08-05 06:38 PM


I agree with stargal. It starts as if He's talking or someone's talking then the narrorator takes over and then back and forth.. maybe I'm wrong. But I understood the meaning of the poem and it was very heartfelt.. and relatable.

Great job.

~Heather~

ps-just cause i liked how interesting this is, it's going in my library

Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes.
Want nothing & you will have everything.

cherrys_rule
Member
since 2006-03-18
Posts 442

3 posted 2006-08-08 08:04 PM


yeah I kindda have to agree with stargal and heather. I got a little confused on the whole poem.
But it did flow very well.

hunnie_girl
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
4 posted 2006-08-09 09:10 PM


yea i liked it but i didnt really understand the end....but it flowed well.
Krysti*

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your
heart.

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