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Teen Poetry #7
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xpyrox04x
New Member
since 2006-06-28
Posts 7


0 posted 2006-06-28 05:52 PM



well, ive written a few poems, non rhyming ones, this is my first post here, with what i consider to be my best poem so far, critism, both good and bad, is encouraged. Enjoy


This sadness enveloping me,
My very being cries,
Depression running through my veins,
As if it were fire, striking pain as it goes,
But through this unhappiness,
My heart beats,
With more determination than ever,
Because although my mind is screaming,
Screaming enough, give up, you’ve lost,
Hope remains in my heart,
Nurtured by the beating walls,
Warmed by raw emotion,
Rekindled by my soul.

The lifeless blood,
In and out of my heart,
But with every passing beat,
That lifeless blood gains hope,
More and more, coursing through my body,
Slowly building up, slowing lifting me,
The warmth in my heart flowing out of me,
Engulfing all who surround me,
But it doesn’t last.

Yet again I’m falling,
The depression invading my body once again,
Reclaiming me as its own,
The hope pushed down once again,
Subdued by the onslaught of sadness,
Im about to explode, too much, I cant take it,
Then to my knees I fall,
And in the only way I know,
I release but droplets of the pain,
Rolling down my cheeks,
They are like memories draining from me,
The more they fall the more I seem to forget the hope,
And so I lay,
My only companion the darkness surrounding me,
An anchor pulling me down, a weight on my mind,
The end has come.

But it Is not the end,
And endless cycle within my life,
Building me up, making me stronger,
Then tearing me down, ripping me apart,
How much longer can I take this?
My seams grow wary of the torture,
My mind grows impatient with my heart,
And so I ask,
When will I let go?

© Copyright 2006 xpyrox04x - All Rights Reserved
SEA
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Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
1 posted 2006-06-28 07:21 PM


Welcome to Pip, very emotional first post...at least to me it was

*please check your email for a special greeting!

stargal
Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352
OR USA
2 posted 2006-06-28 08:02 PM


"But it Is not the end,
And endless cycle within my life,
Building me up, making me stronger,
Then tearing me down, ripping me apart,
How much longer can I take this?
My seams grow wary of the torture,
My mind grows impatient with my heart,
And so I ask,
When will I let go? "


Wow... The imagery I got from this poem was amazing! Yet very sad...

Welcome to pip xpyrox04x! I can't wait to see some more of your work in the near future and I hope you enjoy the site

@-->---

xpyrox04x
New Member
since 2006-06-28
Posts 7

3 posted 2006-06-29 03:24 PM


thanks for the welcome guys, quite glad i found this site,been reading about the forums since i joined, some very talented people in here

ScottY!

the_girl_next_door
Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591
USA
4 posted 2006-06-29 11:22 PM


Wow... this was very deep.. I look forward to reading more of your poetry..

WELCOME TO PipTalk

~Heather~

Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes.
Want nothing & you will have everything.

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