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The Shadow in Blue
Member

since 2006-05-18

Posts 493
EL, Michigan

0 posted 2006-06-16 04:06 PM

The Knockout Punch

As the bell rang and sounded the start to my defeat
flying fists connected with my jaw
slacking and flapping with each hit taken
being mounted with the wrath soley caused by myself

And just when I tried to cover up and defend
I buckled under the pressure that I succombed to far to much
And blow by blow I started to fade
As I yearned for the towel to be thrown in

But fate dealt a blow far worse then the jabs
he punched me down and forced another round
so still in defeat I walked into a kick
a side swipe of sorts that rattled my brain

My assailent crouched down and wrenched at my arm
whispering slurs and dispariging words
As he bludgened my body until my heart gave in
so with one last stab he thrust his elbow around my throat

Thus stiffling my cries that were camoflauged in tears
but unbeknownst to most it was based out of fear
fear of oneself and what one'd become
for it's under this pressure that I realized this fault

And with this weakness exposed I tapped to my foe
the one I've always known deep in my heart
for my foe was the embodiment of fear itself
because in place of the shadow stood the mirror image of myself

the_girl_next_door
Senior Member

since 2006-02-26

Posts 591
USA

1 posted 2006-06-17 12:47 PM

BEAUTIFUL.. in a morbid kinda way. lol jk this was amazing. I love the choice of words and everything.. going in my library.

`Heather~

Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes.
Want nothing & you will have everything.

Frank W. Torres
Member

since 2006-06-10

Posts 133

2 posted 2006-06-17 11:03 AM

Thats interesting. The tent of illusions. Alright!

stargal
Senior Member

since 2006-03-06

Posts 1352
OR USA

3 posted 2006-06-17 04:34 PM

”Thus stifling my cries that were camouflaged in tears
but unbeknownst to most it was based out of fear
fear of oneself and what one'd become
for it's under this pressure that I realized this fault”

All I can really say is this poem is amazing! There’s not much to add to that…

Although, I can’t wait to see more work from you!

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