navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #7 » I've lost my world
Teen Poetry #7
Post A Reply Post New Topic I've lost my world Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Xeonox
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764
CA, USA

0 posted 2006-06-04 10:15 PM



You have taken my heart; take my life as well,
I promise on God’s word, won’t deceive you ever,
See how fate has molded my life, never thought it would happen to me,
Can’t bear to realize what happened, how I became separated from you,
Do me some justice, forgive me please, this is all I ask of you,

In my lust of passion, I became lost, forgetting to keep it simple,
Love is only this, that I take care of it, by your feet I leave my soul,
Take away my serenity, and my happiness, and give me all the pains of life,

My words tell my story, don’t think of them as mockery,
Through many tears, my eyes have faded,
Within them colors of delusion have blended in,

Stay close to me, and I won’t make another mistake, won’t do you any harm.

I speak insanity. I write fantasy. I sleep reality.

© Copyright 2006 Ronil B Tataria - All Rights Reserved
bekahlekah45
Senior Member
since 2006-03-14
Posts 533

1 posted 2006-06-04 10:19 PM


This was an amazing piece.  Great structure, very sweet message, and i really enjoyed this read!
stargal
Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352
OR USA
2 posted 2006-06-06 09:24 PM


I liked it, I liked it more than I could probably ever put into words, because they'd be kind of meaningless...

I loved the second stanza most though, I believe to a certain degree I can relate well to that piece. I enjoyed the whole poem though.

Thanks for sharing once again with everyone, it's very pleasurable to read your poems

@-->---

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #7 » I've lost my world

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary