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Teen Poetry #7
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rhia_5779
Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334
California

0 posted 2006-07-12 01:22 AM



As I walk down the street,  people gather at corners
Discussing the war, dressed in black like mourners
Hushed voices, speaking of no good
Heads down, eyes looking up

Sending private pleas to anyone who might listen
We hope to watch a graduation, rather than tears on cheeks glisten
Rather celebrate for new years, than celebrate, that we are alive
The old ones mutter, and cluck about how no one will be able to survive

Every time war tanks pass through our town
They bring tears, and many many frowns
Once again war is about to drop down in our peaceful midst
Take our young men, the more we tell them no, the more they resist

Every time we see signs of war, our children begin to die
For every gun brought out, the more tears that we will cry
Bombs begin to fall, gunshots mark our homes
Each time we hear about liberators, we are left alone

All of us who have made it through, those of who have lived through this nightmare
Don’t care about sides, only hoping that soon somebody up there will answer our prayers
Every gunshot, each bomb that plummets to our earth
Just another telling of what’s to come, for what its worth

Each war, we sit by living as we can, it becomes a routine
The hope that maybe someday, no war, just a forgotten dream
Our bomb shelters are permanent
Our grief is completely imminent

We stand in a solemn grief torn group in the streets as black gloomy hearse do pass by
Muttering beneath our breath, hoping that it won’t be our loved ones who had to die
If we had time to think, maybe we would be sorry for those thoughts
But that would be in peacetime, now we can only remember each loss


Every time soldiers drill through our alleys, we look away
Each time hoping, praying, that this new war won’t be to stay
Our lives have been chosen, to forever live a life of sorrow
always to live side by side with a war, trying to survive in shadow.

© Copyright 2006 rhia_5779 - All Rights Reserved
oh_my_goshijustgotexcited
Member
since 2006-07-12
Posts 52
USA, IDAHO
1 posted 2006-07-12 03:46 AM


very touching, thats all i have to say

Viola

stargal
Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352
OR USA
2 posted 2006-07-12 12:40 PM


Hey Rhia,

Nice poem... It's so sad that for us to be able to live in freedom we sometimes have to fight wars.

I'm not really sure what I think about this poem. No offence, but in some ways I think it is wrong that we don't celebrate that there are men and women willing to go out there to fight for us. Not that it is a good thing it's just that how do you think they feel when we... turn our backs on them? I'm not sure if i'm saying this right... all well...

I thought that this poem had great form though, I liked how it was setup in stanzas. That is always helpful in some of the longer poems. I appreciate that you do that. Not only does it help me keep my place it is also, sometimes, easier to decipher the poem.

Thanks for sharing, I wish I had more to say but ... Well, it's probably better that I don't  


@-->---

rhia_5779
Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334
California
3 posted 2006-07-12 07:22 PM


i wasnt saying that its not good to remember those who fight for us, im sorrry we have war in general. i was saying how mothers who have children in the war, probbaly would rather celebrating their childrens graduation or such, then celebrating living one more day. it was kinda set in a diff country not really here
cherrys_rule
Member
since 2006-03-18
Posts 442

4 posted 2006-07-22 09:33 AM


MAn this was very touching. I almost cried. =( j'j. But this was a very emotional poem. I really liked it. Good job, and hope to see more of your work.


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