Memories...after additions

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CrAzI_bAbI_cHiKa
Member

since 2003-07-16

Posts 248

0 posted 2005-11-04 03:25 PM

She took in a deep breath
Late into this endless night
Wondering which of her memories
She was made to write
Those that burned her soul,
That forced her heart to bleed
Or those of love and lust
Or the times of friends in need
Memories of times
Where life was simple as could be
...Keeping this all in mind
She drowned herself in memories…

Moments of pain and sorrow
Flashed before her eyes
As she lied on her bed
Breathing out slow sighs.
A fight with a former friend
Another’s early wake
Skinning her knee as a child
And a boyfriend who was fake
Seventeen years of memories
Flooded her brain that night
And she stared at a blank paper
wondering which to write
Who am I? She thought
What do I have to say?
What single defining moment
Has made me this way?
Bringing her pen to paper
She started her life’s tale,
Writing only truths about her
Whether success or fails
And it was in this quick motion
While writing happiness and tears
That she had finally realized
The impact of her years…

"I am a history book
Without a finished end
I am a human story...
One unable to be penned.”

AtLsHawTy17
Member

since 2004-09-07

Posts 60
IL,

1 posted 2005-11-04 07:51 PM

WOW that was awesome good write i like your work

Too late to cry, you're gone... why should I cry, you can't wipe the tears dry, so what am I to do? I need to be with you....-Me

Kaos
Member

since 2001-08-02

Posts 317
between space and time

2 posted 2005-11-07 05:24 PM

damn, another brilliant piece. i really enjoy your work, you have a very keen creative sense about emotions and what not. You have this knack for expressing how you feel in the most profound ways, bravo.

"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light"
-Dylan Thomas

Sweetpoet16m4u04
Member

since 2002-11-10

Posts 153
Ma, U.S.A

3 posted 2005-11-08 07:13 PM

Hey you!! Glad to see your still writing!! Your poetry is amazing as always! Loved reading this and i looke forward to more!!

Sexy
Member

since 2005-11-25

Posts 53

4 posted 2005-11-25 05:33 PM

I love your writing it makes me feel as if it were me writing it but its in a deeper thought

4christ13
New Member

since 2005-11-25

Posts 4
Georgia, United States

5 posted 2005-11-25 06:35 PM

This is some good work.

aujussy wolf

Senior Member

since 2003-08-09

Posts 1215
Michigan

6 posted 2005-11-27 07:45 PM

the ending was strong , i liked that
good work chika
~wolfie



And it was in this quick motion
While writing happiness and tears
That she had finally realized
The impact of her years…

CrAzI_bAbI_cHiKa
Member

since 2003-07-16

Posts 248

7 posted 2005-11-29 07:14 PM

Thanks a lot guys!...and actually, I'm wondering. Young_blood(Alex), if you read this, could you take the time to post...I really want to hear what you think about some of my stuff. At last check, you thought I was lame, and un-creative, to put it into layman's terms.

Thanks so much guys...You're awesome, as always!

<3love, always.
<3<3 ker

When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better.
Mae West

I_heart_rock
Junior Member

since 2005-11-26

Posts 10

8 posted 2005-11-29 09:36 PM

i read ur first draft and i thought tht was great but it only got better...tht was a great writing...ur really good

-Jess

DejaEntendu
Member

since 2005-12-06

Posts 82
Pennsylvania

9 posted 2005-12-06 11:57 AM

great poem. It reminds me of those nights where I may go to bed, but feeling unfulfilled, and I just lay awake, wondering about anything that comes to mind. Great Job

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